Thursday, May 3, 2012

TLS Fics of the Week: Six Sensational Recs and Reviews!!

A Soft Place to Land by Btwnthestacks
Single father Edward Cullen and his daughter are looking for a soft place to land. In an attempt to help her, he turns to a program at the local library. While two furry friends help his child find her confidence, their owner will mend his broken heart. Twilight - Rated: M

Reviewed by: Les Sharpe

When I found out A Soft Place to Land was one of the top 5 for Fic of the Week I begged ... begged ... to write this review. I'm not kidding. Within five minutes of the winners being announced I was ready to go. I love this story. I love it - A LOT. I love this author. I love her - A LOT. btwnthestacks is one of the most genuine, sweetest, special people in this fandom, and for that reason alone you should read A Soft Place to Land, but the fact that the story is amazing, well that's just the icing on the cake.

Edward is a single dad. He's lonely and works hard and has a daughter named Madigan (which in my not-so-humble opinion might just be the greatest name for a fictional child ever!!). Mag, as she is called by her daddy, and Edward are both still trying to recover from the pain of Edward's ex-wife and Madigan's mom, Kate's abrupt departure from their lives when she decides she doesn't want to be a wife or mother any longer. They struggle every day and poor Madigan withdraws a bit more as each day passes, much to Edward's dismay.

I find the crumpled piece of paper on the very bottom of my daughter's backpack. I unfold it, noticing that it's a note from her teacher. I notice a lack of exclamation points among the beautifully scripted words and I know from my own days of carrying such notes home from school that this can't be good. That must be why this stationary features smiling worms and giant laughing apples that seem to say, "don't shoot the messenger."

Mr. Cullen, I would like to set up a conference time with you to talk about some issues I'm having with Madigan. Please call me at your earliest convenience.

Mrs. Newton


I squeeze my eyes shut and pinch the bridge of my nose in an attempt to control the anger and panic. This is exactly what I've been afraid of since the moment I hung up the phone that terrible night. I thought that a fresh start and close proximity to my family would help. I thought that being with her constantly and working my fingers to the bone to make sure that she feels loved and secure would make things better for her. But one look at that fucking laughing apple makes me feel like a deflated balloon - like a colossal failure...all over again.

Have no fear though, because here to save the day is the Read to Dogs program set up at the local library by Alice, who just happens to be Edward's sister and is run by none other than Dr. Bella Swan, resident veterinarian. She and her two beloved Scottish Deerhounds, Gandalf and Wallace, work their magic and in no time have little Miss Madigan out of her shell. Of course Madigan isn't the only put under the spell of Bella and before long she and Edward become involved. Bella works wonders on both father and daughter and as their relationships grow and strengthen you can see the true Edward and Madigan emerge from the rubble Kate left behind.

She sticks out her hand. "Hi Madigan, I'm Bella. I'm very excited to finally meet you. Your aunt Alice has told me so much about you! Would you like to come and meet my dogs? They've been waiting for you, too," She finishes with a wink.

Madigan looks up at me, unsure.

"Can I, Daddy?" she whispers.

"Of course, baby." I answer reassuringly.

Alice comes to stand next to me as I watch Bella walk away with my daughter. She puts her arm around my waist and squeezes.

Once again, Bella crouches down to Madigan's level and I listen as she introduces her dogs Gandalf and Wallace. Mag says nothing. She just stands there, taking in their wiry gray fur and huge paws. I see Bella instruct Mag on how to pet the dogs. She takes Mag's little hand in hers and leads it, palms up, to one of the giant snouts.

"Boys, this is Miss Madigan. Can you tell her hello?" Bella asks in a wonderful motherly voice.
I see one of the dog's head move toward Mag's hand and get ready to lunge toward it to protect my daughter when I see a long pink tongue emerge and take a lick along her fingers.

Madigan gasps and Bella gives her a breathtaking smile.

And then I hear it - something that I didn't realize I hadn't been hearing enough of until yesterday.

It's the sound of my daughter's laughter.

This story has it all. It will make you laugh and smile and pant a little because yes, there are some hot, hot moments between Edward and Bella as they begin to navigate their mutual attraction for each other. Bella is feisty and funny and warm and adores both father and daughter. Madigan is precious and precocious, and with her new best friends, Gandalf and Wallace, really begins to shine. Edward learns to let go and open himself back up again to the possibility of love and happiness and sharing both a woman that has him totally enamored and gives as good as she gets.

I love this story ... A LOT. I tell btwnthestacks frequently that I want to wrap this story up and carry it with me always because it's like a little ball of sunshiney goodness that makes my heart happy. Every chapter gets better and better. Read A Soft Place to Land, I promise you'll fall in love with it and her.

Dear Maggie by Jenny0719-twilover76
A heart leads Bella back home to Forks... and to the brother of the woman who donated it. M for Lemons/OOC/Language  Twilight - Rated: M

Reviewed by: stephk0525 and twilover76

Dear Maggie is such a great fic, it required two of us to chime in on this review!

Steph (stephk0525):

It’s no secret that I love Jenny0719 (@JT040708 on the Twitter) in crazy amounts. In fact, if you follow both of us, you quite likely have seen me throw out one of about a billion pet names I have for her. I mean, we all have numerous terms of affection for an author we’ve bribed with our respective assets to garner pre-reading duties, right? Right?!?! Yeah, because that’s not creepy at all.

I started out reading Dear Maggie the same as everyone else, patiently waiting for updates and getting more attached to this troubled, foul-mouthed and sexy as all get-out Edward. With each new chapter, I applauded Bella’s strength, tenacity and will. But somewhere about chapter ten or so, Jenny had a few minor concerns and wanted some feedback. So, being the opportunistic h00r that I am, I batted my eyelashes, shimmied a little and offered to take a peek at the chapter. Do you blame me?

The next thing I know, I’m getting chapters right and left and wondering how in the name of all that is holy I got lucky enough to be an official pre-reader.

I can say with absolute certainty that this is one of the most honest fics I’ve read, especially given the fact that the events that set it in motion are very out of the ordinary. Both Bella and Edward have been faced with difficulties in their respective lives and survived them against incredible odds. Yes, there’s angst, but it isn’t contrived or thrown in just for the sake of having some heartfail. Uh, no pun intended there. These characters, particularly Bella and Edward, aren’t caricatures or cliched. They are three-dimensional, fleshed out and very realistically flawed. They make mistakes, but they learn from them. Even better, they grow. They evolve. And that is precisely what draws you in and keeps you reading.  

The journey for these two isn’t simple. There’s a lot of soul-searching. There’s enormous amounts of sacrifice. I won’t lie, none of it is easy, or pretty for that matter. But Jenny paints such a vivid picture, you as a reader are with these two every single step of the way as they navigate the dicey pitfalls of not only first love, but issues from their pasts that don’t stay there.

Obviously, Bella and Edward are singularly strong; neither of them would still be alive if they weren’t. What’s incredibly powerful is that together, they are even more so and you feel like there isn’t much out there that they couldn’t handle.

Heather (twilover76):

I want to ditto everything Steph wrote above.  I fell in love with this story and I’m pretty sure I gave up naming rights to my first-born child as a bribe to be a pre-reader.  Jenny has mad talent and every new chapter I get to see makes me want more.

Dear Maggie has one of the most endearing Bella characters I’ve run across in my reading.  She was diagnosed with hypertrophic cardiomyopathy at sixteen and had a heart transplant to keep her alive.  As with many organ recipients, Bella felt a need to learn more about who her donor had been.  Little did she know at the time where exactly this search would lead her.

When she moved from Phoenix to live with her father in Forks, WA, she wasn’t only there to attend the University of Washington.  She was there to meet the brother of Maggie Carr, the girl whose heart Bella had received.   Edward. Too bad he was a complete asshole. Or at least that what he wants you to think...

I slipped through the door and glanced around quickly. Another door that led to the office was on my right, and a cavernous expanse of auto equipment and tools were to my left. The sound of angry, heavy rock music streamed from a stereo in the corner. I let go of the door and started toward the direction of the music, only to jump in place when the door made a popping sound and slammed shut behind me.

"Fucking Christ, Emmett!" a deep, agitated voice called out. "Are you ever going to fix that piece of shit door?"

My eyes followed the sound of the man's voice and found him under the chassis of an older, maroon Malibu. Nothing but a pair of jeans and black work boots stuck out, both marred with grease and oil and… God only knew what else.

I cleared my throat pointedly and watched his body tense under the car. He threw some sort of tool down, creating a clanking sound as it skittered across the cement floor, and pushed himself out from under the car in a smooth, practiced movement.

He stood up and stretched, his lean muscles flexing and exposing his stomach and the dark trail of hair that led… I swallowed hard and focused on his face. He pinned me with a hard stare, causing a blush to creep up into my cheeks. His jaw was strong and tense, and his eyes were as green as the trees and the moss that clung to their trunks outside, burning with such intensity that I lost my breath.

He was, without a doubt, the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen.

He grabbed a faded red rag off the hood of the car and wiped some of the black off of his hands, wordlessly smudging it across his perfect, pale skin before dragging one hand through his messy copper hair roughly.

"We're closed," he said, digging into his pocket for something.

He pulled out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter, tipping the pack enough so he could pull one out. He lit it and took a deep drag; smoke curled in the air around him, fading as it rose toward the ceiling. I watched the smoke hypnotically plume from his mouth, unable to think as I saw the way every part of his body relaxed almost instantly. My hand unconsciously came up to rub at my chest, and he lazily followed the movement, letting his tongue roll over his lips once. My chest burned, ached with longing, and then all of the sudden my brain kicked back into gear and I jerked myself as far away from him as I could get.

He looked… pissed, for lack of a better word, but his voice was smooth and calm. Uncaring. "Don't like smokers?"

I didn't know how to answer that question. It'd never bothered me before, but now, I didn't want to breathe it in, knowing that its toxins were going straight into my bloodstream… this heart.

My silence was answer enough for him. "Then leave."

I shook my head and focused on finding my voice again. "I um, I… Are you…? Dr. Cullen said you were hiring," I stuttered, immediately flushing in embarrassment again.

His eyes narrowed as he scrutinized my face for some reason. "You want Emmett. He'll be back tomorrow morning." He blew a stream of smoke my way and raised his brow, almost as if he was daring me to say something to him about it.

I backed up a little further. "Stop it, would you? I can't be around it."

He shot me a patronizing look. "Allergic?"

"No, the heart… I mean, my heart…" I shook my head, deciding not to bother with an explanation. He wouldn't have cared, and even if he had, I didn't want his pity. I'd had enough of that in my life. "Never mind."

He shrugged and turned away to dig in the massive toolbox behind him, leaving me to stand there stupidly. My jaw dropped at his blatant disregard for manners, and anger pounded through me.

"What a fucking prick," I muttered, spinning around to leave.

I was almost to the door when another loud clattering cut through the air behind me, stopping me dead in my tracks. I craned my neck slowly around to see him, catching him as he dragged his gaze over my ass. Heat bloomed inside me so strong that for the second time in the span of only a few minutes, I lost the capability to breathe again.

"What?" I eventually snapped, still fuming through my haze. "Like what you see? Expect me to just bend over and let you do me here?"

A tic worked in his jaw, and he threw the cigarette butt down on the floor and stamped it out angrily. "Not in the fucking least," he retorted, wrenching the volume level up to blaring and dropping down under the car before I could say anything else.

I exhaled sharply and stormed out of the garage, determined to get out to the truck before I let any angry tears fall. All I could think about was making it home so I could start searching through the classifieds while I cooked dinner. There was no way I would ever work around someone so disrespectful.

Despite Edward’s harsh demeanor, Bella feels a physical pull toward him.  An actual ache in her heart to be closer.  As much as he tries to push her away, due to his own plethora of past demons, he also feels drawn to her at the same time.   Their banter as they get to know each other is at times flirty, at times antagonistic, at times gut-wrenching, and at times hilarious.  Jenny does a great job at showing the best and worst in both Bella and Edward.

I ran my hands through my hair and looked out to the garage. Every single man in this place was staring at us. More specifically, Bella. I snapped my teeth together as rage bubbled up inside me again, along with a strange feeling I couldn't seem to shake. I didn't know what it was; I just knew that I didn't like the thought of anyone looking at her like that. Like she was some sort of…

But was it really any different than what I'd done earlier? Fantasizing about her like that? She was beautiful. Any hot-blooded male in their right mind would want to be with her. Not to mention, I didn't have claim on her. I'd never have claim on her.

So it shouldn't matter.

"They're all staring at you," I growled lowly.

She blinked. "What?"

When I pointed out toward the garage, everyone instantly dropped their heads and went back to what they'd been doing before.

"Oh. I'm sure they're just trying to figure out if I'll be working here or not," she answered flippantly.I watched a blush creep up into her cheeks and felt my dick pop up at attention, just like it had last night.

Which pissed me off more than anything else. Sex was the last thing I needed to be thinking about. Especially with someone so much better than me.

"You are, aren't you?"

"I am what?"

"Taking the job."

She nodded. "Yeah."

"Yeah. Of course you are," I groaned angrily, shoving my hands through my hair.

"What's that supposed to mean?" she asked, putting one hand on her hip and glowering over at me.

"It means that I would really rather you didn't. That's all."

Her mouth sprung open in surprise from my honesty. "God, you're rude, you know that?"

I shrugged, causing her to let out a little screech of frustration.

"You really don't care?"

"Not really."

She huffed. "Look, I want this job. Need this job. So as much as it pains me to say it, I figure if we're going to work together, I should at least try to be nice to you. But let me make something clear. If it were any other circumstance, I would introduce my kneecap to your balls right now."

My brows shot up. What was with these girls and physical violence today?

"You have that affect on me," she continued, trailing her fingers along the edge of the desk. "I just want to… hurt you when you talk to me like that."

If she was looking for an apology then she'd be waiting forever. I needed her to hate me. The more she hated me, the less I had to worry about her coming near me.

"Keep your knees away from my balls. I'm fairly attached to them," I replied instead.

Another little giggle burst free from her lips and she relaxed. "I'm sure you are. Boys are strangely attached to their… bits."

"And you're not?"

"Not like that. Of course, I don't really have anything of note, so it doesn't matter."

Oh, she had a warped view of herself, this one.

I flopped down into one of the chairs sitting against the wall and looked for something to do, because talking was not my forte. Another cigarette would be fucking sublime right about now, but I got the impression that Miss Swan here didn't like smokers. And while I'm usually the first one to blow smoke in someone's face just to get a rise out of them, I couldn't bring myself to pull out my pack and light up in front of her.

I ran my hands over my face. Christ, I was in trouble if I was already ignoring a craving for some random chick I didn't even know. Worse was that my body was still demanding to shut the blinds and bend her over the desk so I could touch every inch of her smooth skin and watch her body accept mine. I could feel it crackle in the air around me, and every breath—every step—Bella took pulled me closer and closer to the ledge. Her sweet scent filled the room, and the way her clothes clung to her every move… I was nearly ready to launch myself at her when she finally spoke again.

"So my dad tells me that you and your brothers were adopted," Bella said roughly, almost as if she felt it too.


I jerked myself out of the haze to answer her. "Yup."

"How old were you?"

I gritted my teeth so I didn't scream the answer. I hated people probing into my past. "Fourteen."

Her eyes widened in surprise. "I thought you'd be younger."

"Nope. I got the full experience of a shitty life in Chicago."

Her thin, dark brows furrowed with my words, but she didn't bother saying any more. It was like she could sense not to push me. And because she didn't, I suddenly wanted to tell her everything. I wanted to spill my secrets and feel the weight of them disintegrate from my shoulders. I wanted to tell her about my biological mother, my fucked up mother who needed a quick ticket out of town and threw her son to the wolves to get the money for her escape.

Surely if I told her, though, I'd watch her run away, screaming in the night. I was tainted. It was inevitable.

It truly is an amazing experience to watch how Bella and Edward evolve throughout the story and become exactly what the other one needs.  I won’t give any more details away, because reading all the twists and turns that come is part of what makes it great.  There is a reason Dear Maggie keeps winning these fic of the week’s because it is one of the best stories out there.  With only a few chapters left before completion, it’s the perfect time to get started if you haven’t already.

How to Paint A House by Maggie's Gutter
Bella Swan is a naive fifteen year old, set to spend another kiss-less summer alone. Edward is new to town, and doesn't know a soul. Watch an unlikely friendship blossom over the simple task of painting a house. But for these two, nothing is simple. Twilight - Rated: M

Reviewed by: La MoMO

Do we all remember how it feels like, to be fifteen, going on sixteen, and to be crushing on a guy to the point you're in love, and he's all you see, and yet you have absolutely NO CLUE how to go about it?There are no clear lines. There are no codes of conduct. Everything is too much. Or too little. Or too soon. Or too late. There is only uncertainty and expectation. There is the thrill of anticipation and agonies of doubt and rejection.There is the unspeakable limbo of "friendship".And slowly, you change, things change, he changes…and one day, things fall into place for a brief second. You both become "more" to each other.And cue a second slew of agony, harrowing doubts, second-guessing and inadequacy in spades.

Still..he is your whole world. You only think and see in absolutes. Meeting him is the best thing that has happened to you. He's the most beautiful, the bravest, the kindest guy you ever met. And he is. Because young love only factors in the absolutes, where feelings are concerned. One moment is misery, the other is bliss.

This is what happens in Maggie's Gutter incredibly sweet and beautifully written tale, How To Paint A House. The usual suspects live in Forks. Charlie Swan wants his house repainted over summer break but he gets his leg broken and is confined indoors for a few weeks. The new addition in town, the doctor's son, Edward Cullen, is recruited for the job. And he shares the task with Charlie's daughter Bella.Bella is a shy, bookish, socially reclusive teenager on the verge of her 16th birthday, and she's losing her usual footing because her closest friend Angela is going over to the Skank Side.Edward puts her to work, and lends an ear to her musings. She does the same, because the guy is, after all, the new kid in town, and has no one to talk to. And he has baggage.

Follow these two very closely as they explore their friendship, their companionship, and whatever else is coming their way. Their connection will tug at your heartstrings every single time, and nothing will sound contrived, silly, or overdone. Bella is a faithful portrayal of a 15 year-old girl in love for the first time, and Edward is an adorable tangle of boyish charm going on to a more manly appearance (which doesn't help Bella's plight any), of doubts, guilt over his reckless past, and insecurity about his future.

This is a heartfelt, wonderfully written, evenly paced and emotionally intense journey. It will suck you in, like current while you're going rafting on a nearby river, on a long, hot, end-of-summer day…..


Legendary by WhatsMyNomDePlume-rec'd by Twific Crackmum
Preternaturally irresistible, devastatingly charming Edward Cullen seems to have some strange power over the females in Forks…and Bella is scared she might know just what it is.M for language & naughty fun. Part mystery, part drama, all Edward. Twilight - Rated: M

Reviewed by: evilnat

WhatsMyNomDePlume has penned some amazing stories, The Best I Ever Had being one of them.  So there’s no surprise that Legendary is just as good and definitely deserves to be one of the Fics of the Week. 

I read Legendary back when it was a WIP, and was always hanging for updates.  It’s well written and if you like a high school fic with a twist you will love this. 

Right from the start of chapter one you will be sucked in, just the description of Edward will be enough to get you reading.

James Dean leather jacket? Check.

Long-legged, tight-assed strut? Check.

Cock-sure, wicked glint in his eye? Check.

Around these parts—meaning Forks, Port Angeles and even up near Hoquiam— Edward Cullen had become a legend, a supernatural phenomenon, an unstoppable force.

High school boys had pimples, body odor and no control over their own bodies. Despite attending Forks High, Edward Cullen was not a high school boy. His skin was smooth and clean. He smelt like midnight and bed sheets. And he had utter control over every female who met him.

He would turn his smile on his prey of choice and that was it. Girls and women alike would follow him into his house or his car or the hall closet next to the office. They would emerge after an hour, sometimes two, sometimes (for the lucky ones) even an entire night and look at the world through new eyes. Edward Cullen was kryptonite, Godiva truffles and the perfect little black dress personified. There was no one's type he wasn't, no heart he couldn't flutter with a look, no panty he couldn't drop with a smile.

There were Casanovas before him. Don Juans after him. But nobody could match Edward Cullen.

There was something about him… something different.

When Edward Cullen first moved back to Forks at the start of his sophomore year, there was nothing special about him. Nothing to separate him from his peers or to indicate the panjandrum of infamy he would soon command. His unique amber-gold eyes shone bright but went unnoticed under the heavy black frames he wore. His sharp cheekbones and angular jaw were preternatural and premature in someone his age, but couldn't be seen due to the curtain of thick, auburn hair he hid his face under. That thick, auburn hair was overlong and stringy. He hadn't reached his full height yet, a fact further coupled by his slight hunch. He was as invisible as his never-present parents and barely mattered to anyone.

He went away for the following summer.

And he came back.

Bella isn’t sure what, but something is up with Edward.  He has changed so dramatically from the shy nerdy boy he was.  He’s suddenly God’s gift to women and taking whomever he wants whenever he wants.  Even in chapter two he’s already been around, so to speak.

Rumor has it, the only thing Rosalie ever said to him was his name. Which she screamed during lunch, so loudly that Mrs. Cope heard it in the office and came to see why Ms. Hale was making such a ruckus. And there Rosalie was, her back arched on the hood of the car she and Edward had been fixing, legs on his shoulders, being, in the words Mrs. Cope used to tell Ms. Gianna, "screwed right past heaven and into her next life."

Edward got detention for a week. Rosalie got even. Both made high school history.

And as far as Edward's punishment went? He started detention on Tuesday afternoon. On Wednesday morning, Ms. Gianna, the detention supervisor, put in an order for a new desk. When Superintendent Smith asked why she needed another desk despite the school providing new ones for all classrooms a few months prior, Ms. Gianna could only giggle. Edward was not in detention on Wednesday or ever again.

Bella is determined to uncover what is going on with Edward and expose him.  She starts to believe that maybe he has the supernatural working on his side and in the meantime tries not to succumb to her own attraction to him.

Bella couldn't believe her eyes. No. Scratch that. She couldn't believe her eyes when she'd seen Renata emerge from the room. Now, she just couldn't believe that any high school boy could have his own harem. He was like a fucking factory. No literally, a factory of fucking.

Her anger caused the blood to rush through her ears, thus making her unsure as to whether or not she was imagining Didyme's low, impassioned calls. As noises and accompanying images hurtled through her brain, Bella felt her pulse increasing like slow acceleration of a train, until it was throttling her towards an anger she had nowhere to direct to.

Chug chug. 

Edward appeared to have just had a threesome with Jane and Renata.

Chug chug chug chug. 

He was currently in that same room with Didyme.

Chug chug chug chug chug chug.

He was systematically working his way through the roster of randy, raunchy Forks females.

Chug chug chug chug chug chug chug chug. 

With one notable exception: herself.

Choo choo! Choo choo! 

Bella's anger was so great she was surprised steam didn't spring from her ears like the caboose of a locomotive. She didn't know whether she was more incensed by Edward's behavior, his lack thereof towards her or her own preoccupation with either. But on the same track as her anger came one singular, focused thought—there was no way Edward Cullen was a normal, human boy. And she'd be damned if she got distracted from that fact again. She'd be damned if she didn't get proof.

Legendary is smart and witty.  I promise you will love this man-whore Edward, he’s charming and funny and although he seems to go through pretty much all of the female population of Forks you don’t find it gross. (And I forgive him for saying he doesn’t like the band Incubus at the end of chapter five!).  Bella is hilarious as she gets more and more aggravated and determined to find out his secret and with each chapter you find yourself speculating what his deal is too.

WhatsMyNomDePlume never disappoints, her humor and character development is perfectly executed.  She is a master at writing witty banter, her story structure is interesting and there’s no unnecessary filler detracting from the great storyline.  

If you haven’t already, go check it out!


Scotch, Gin and the New Girl by WTVOC
Les Liaisons Dangereuses, je croix. We were Cruel Intentions. We are Gossip Girls. We do not care. At all." all-human. Twilight - Rated: M

Reviewed by: Kassiah LovesOj

When I found out that Scotch, Gin, and the New Girl was up for Fic of the Week, I was so excited!  I was thrilled to write this review for TLS, even though I'm a little worried that you guise are getting sick of me threatening you begging you to read it.  It was a WIP when I started reading, but three years and a million fics later, this one remains my favorite of all time.  I've already listed my top eleven reasons that I love it on the Fictionators, but I can go on and on about it forever.  It has everything that you want and more.  It's got angst, it's funny, it's serious grip-the-edge-of-your-seat drama, and it has one of the best lemons I've ever read.  It's sexy and smart.  And it has the best characters of any fic, ever; regardless of who your favorite characters in twific are, this has something for you.  Well, maybe not Newton, but anyone else and you're golden.

It all starts with a bet:

"The daughter of the chief of police cannot be infiltrated," Alice said, her proclamation punctuated with a nod of her head. Rose gave a sneaky smile; I already knew where this was going.

"I have no wish to do the new girl," I said, a bored tone entering my voice. Shit, ladies. Give me a challenge of some sort. That Lauren chick had bugged me for like, two weeks afterward. I am not interested in inducting another member into the "Do Me Again, Edward" Fan Club.

"Edward. Like we'd be so boring," Rosalie said, her condescending tone making my skin tingle. God, she's such a cunt. I love it.

"What's in it for me?" I asked, desperate to sound unaffected. Please, please. Let this be what I hope it is.

"Well. What if we made your fondest wish come true?" Alice was stroking Rosalie's shoulders, and she leaned down, whispering into Rose's ear. Her arms encircled around, and I couldn't help it. My eyes widened slightly as I saw Alice palm Rosalie's breast before ending in a hug. The two turned as one toward me, both grinning. They had me, and they knew it.

"Okay, Cullen. Let's talk turkey, because I'm already bored. You nail the Swan girl, and you get to fuck us. Both. Same. Time. Interested?"

It's his dream come true, and so our beloved lothario Edward (whose chosen libation is Scotch) sets his sights on the new girl, Bella Swan.  Meanwhile, Rosalie has made a bet of her own with Bella, telling her that she can't resist Edward.  As much as Bella tries to prove her wrong, it turns out Rosalie is right--Bella can't resist him.

Then I saw him pointing at me.

Gorgeous, bored, beautiful, arrogant Edward Cullen was pointing at me.

I resisted the urge to look over my shoulder.

His eyes burned in to me, but his bored expression never changed and his finger kept pointing directly at me.

Rosalie had found a spot next to him and her hand snaked around his chest; still his finger stayed pointed like a gun at me.

Did he want me to go over there?

I did.

His eyes stayed on me the entire time I walked over there.

"What?" I asked.

"You look like fun."

"I am."

"Why don't you sit with me?"

He was sandwiched between Rosalie and an intriguing kid who had a dangerous grin and shaggy I-don't-give-a-fuck hair.

"Nowhere to sit," I shrugged so coolly, even I was impressed.

Edward glanced down at his lap and then back up at me.

What's a girl to do?

I couldn't fuck him, but I could sure as hell get a feel for what I was missing.

As the story progresses, Edward becomes so much more than a playboy and Bella learns that it's okay to not be so strong all of the time.  Sure, they're crazy hot for each other, but more than that, they like each other, and it becomes more than winning (or losing) a bet.

So when she crawled into my lap and started hypnotizing me with her lips and hips, I was actually surprised. I figured she'd be stunned or pissed off or disgusted or at the very least indignant, but no.

I sat there and let her grind into me, biting my mouth. And for once, I let go. I just fucking went with it. I wasn't sighing inwardly, or taking glances at the clock on the dash to figure out how long I would have to keep kissing her face until I could go further; I just… let go. For once in my damned life. Let go.

And kissed back. Really kissed back. I found my hands wandering, smoothing over skin and ribs and waist and there was no real thought process. I remember marveling over my lack of plan; just… touching. Tasting. Everything. Every sense was involved. I was aware of her fucking smell, letting it fill my mouth and nose every time I took a quiet, much-needed breath; I could hear her whimpers, her sighs. The sound of her knees squirming against the leather of my seat, her leg muscles quivering every time I inched my hands elsewhere. I knew girls were soft, but she has got to have the silkiest, best skin I've ever felt. Warm and comfortable and I just wanted to touch every bit of her with my fingertips, with my palms. I wanted to rub my face against the skin of her belly to see if it felt as fucking amazing as I assumed.

And just when I realized that there was no way we were going to do this in my damned car, that I wanted to turn the fuck around and go up to my room… crash.

They both know they're holding back, but why?  Trust me, when they figure stuff out--it's epic.  

So, what's up with the Gin in Scotch, Gin, and the New Girl?  Well, that would be Edward's longtime friend and Bella's new BFF, Jasper.  Seriously ya'll, this is the best Jasper ever.

Jasper smoothly reached down and picked up her backpack, smiling and carrying on and flirting shamelessly. He certainly is a charming motherfucker; it was that Southern nanny he had as a kid; she taught him to always act the gentleman; it's how he rivaled me for the amount of tail he got on a weekly basis. I relied on my killer wit; he relied on his charm. We made quite the pair.

He was standing very close to her now, and he leaned down to whisper shamelessly in her ear; she giggled and blushed a bit, and I wanted to punch him in the throat. He held out her backpack and she turned around, slipping her arms in the straps. Jasper then lifted his head and made direct eye contact with me since I hadn't moved- I was too annoyed and absorbed by him stepping in on my shit on purpose. He lifted one corner of his mouth and then mouthed over her head, "Foo Fighters, bitch."

There's so much more to this story than I am able to articulate.  I don't want to give away more of the plot, but there is so much awesome here.  Isn't it enough to say it's my favorite?  You have to read it, if for nothing else than to experience the amazingness that is jandco and withthevampsofcourse.  It's high-school fic at it's finest, and I can't wait for you to read it.

Waterloo by Spanglemaker9
I was defeated; you won the war. But how could I ever refuse? I feel like I win when I lose. Bella hates Edward…maybe. Written for The Faithful Shipper's Abba One Shot Contest. AH
Twilight - Rated: M

Reviewed by: Twific Crackmum

This great short story originally started life as a one-shot for a competition, but as Spanglemake9 notes in her introduction, hers was the only entry! But she decided to post and expand it anyway - turning the o/s into a nice little ficlet of 5 Chapters.

The story opens with Bella explaining how much she dislikes fellow PhD student, Edward Cullen.

"He breezed in looking like he lost his way to the photo shoot for the next Abercrombie and Fitch catalogue. He was all chagrined and falsely apologetic, flashing his cute little crooked smile and raking his hands through his ridiculous auburn hair like he was actually embarrassed or something. It was absolutely pathetic the way you could hear the entire female half of the room draw in an audible breath at the sight of him. Including me. I'll admit it; my first glimpse of Edward Cullen kind of knocked me back on my ass a little. But you could hardly blame me. He was tall and he was built, but not too much, just enough. He had a face that would make angels weep; cheekbones for days and a jaw line you could sharpen knives on, and his eyes made panties drop on cue. And don't even get me started on that hair; it made you think bad, dirty thoughts.

And he absolutely knew it."

In their last year of study, the two are assigned study carrels next to each other in the library, which Bella is decidedly unhappy about! Her unhappiness turns to anger when books that she needs for her research keep mysteriously disappearing off the shelves - checked out to non other than Edward Cullen.

"Right? Hey, there's a book I'm looking for and it's not on the shelves. Could you take a peek and tell me if it's checked out or just misplaced?"

"Oh," Angela finally said, "it's checked out."

"Checked out? Who would want it? Can you tell who has it?"

"Yeah, hang on…um, Edward Cullen."

That fucker.

"Why the hell does he have my book?" I snapped.

Angela just smiled and shrugged. "Guess you'd have to ask him that."

This situation leads to the pair having to have far more interaction than Bella is used to - or comfortable with! - at first. But things slowly begin to change.

"At least twice a day I was in his stupid carrel, negotiating the use of some book he'd checked out just ahead of me. He seemed to take delight in holding me hostage with research, smirking that obnoxious, Edward-smirk as I begged and wheedled and negotiated time with the materials. He always handed them over eventually, but inevitably at some point in the evening he'd need to check something in one and he'd invade my carrel. I didn't even bother to close my door anymore, since I was just going to have to get up and open it when he started pounding. And it wasn't like he would just take his damned book and go. He'd want to talk about it, which inevitably led to arguing about it, since we rarely saw eye to eye on anything. And God forbid I actually win an argument. He'd sulk away in a huff only to come storming back an hour later, waving some other book under my nose that he claimed proved his point. It was distracting and exhausting…and maybe just a tiny bit fun."

After many battles, the dam finally bursts!

"What? You're doing it on purpose?" I asked in confusion. "You are trying to fuck with me? Why would you do that?"

"I'm asking you again," he said, his voice low and rough, "is it working? Am I getting under your skin?"

I just stood there, staring at him in confusion, not even sure what we were talking about anymore. I was sure that he was still moving closer to me and now he was positively invading my personal space. I was getting all flustered and I could feel my face flush, both from the confrontation and from this crazy, fluttery feeling taking up residence in my stomach. Why was he standing so close to me? And why was he messing with me on purpose? I knew we were adversarial, but why go through so much effort just to bug me?

"Yes," I finally said, my voice hardly audible. "You're getting under my skin."

"Well…" he whispered, because now he was standing right in front of me and he was fixing me with those deadly eyes again, "that's good, then."

"Do you want to be under my skin?" I whispered in return. What? Did I just say that to him? Fucking snake-charmer voo doo.

Suffice to say - some very fun sexy-times ensue, and this is where the original o/s ends. The story then continues on. Chapter 2 is an EPOV - who doesn't love EPOV!?! We get all of Edward's scheming and fantasizing about Bella, which is a lot of fun, and ver HOT :)

The story then moves into a different mode. Our lovers are now a couple, and the story becomes like a bit of a mystery novel. Bella uncovered some interesting information whilst researching material for her dissertation, and Edward thinks it would make a great base for writing a historical novel. Unbeknownst to Bella, he submits her dissertation to a publisher - who agrees! So our intrepid couple depart for Portugal, on the trail of the story of a Portugese sailor and the diary he wrote. I wont go into the details, but what is uncovered turns out to be a lovely historical romance, complete with star-crossed lovers and political intrigue. Bella molds all of this together into a best-selling novel, then gets offered a movie deal! If you've got an hour or two to spare and need a great, quick read, then I'd definitely recommend this story.

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