Thursday, December 29, 2011

Meet the Poll- what we read in TLS over the holidays

A Beer With the Guys by Cara No-rec'd by Nic/Bobby Cullen
This is Edward's story. He loves his life. It's very uncomplicated… until he falls in love with the woman he has a very pleasurable arrangement with. Silly, 'cause they have no reason to worry.
Twilight - Rated: M

All the Wild Horses by Elusivetwilight-rec'd by Edmazing
In her suffocating small hometown, Bella Swan meets widowed Edward Cullen. Can she pull him from the depths of his grief? Is there enough of him left to soothe her clawing loneliness? AUAH E&B. Twilight - Rated: M

Awake in the Infinite Cold by Quothme-rec'd by Vampshavelaws
Sometimes the fruit is forbidden for a reason. A mélange of Twilight and How to Be, with an Artward who so carefully and so softly sneaks under her skin and into her soul. Not your typical E/B romance. Complete. Twilight - Rated: M

Curtains by Rochelle Allison-rec'd by Nic
Sometimes, no matter how much you love someone, they won't love you back. Or maybe they just can't... right now. This is the WitFit plot "Curtains", novella-style. Twilight - Rated: M

Do Over by Tkegl-rec'd by Jo Ficfreak
Every Christmas Eve, Edward Cullen sits in a bar and regrets the decision he made ten years earlier that tore Bella from him. But when he gets a second chance to right that wrong, it's not quite what he expected. Twilight - Rated: M

Good Deal by M7707-rec'd by Jaime Arkin/Nic/Edmazing/Kitty Vuitton
Bella Swan hates Rosalie Hale. Her idea of revenge? Sleeping with the Ice Queen's boyfriend, Edward Cullen. AH, very OOC, very rated M. Twilight - Rated: M

In Places No One Will Find by CarrieCee-rec'd by Crooked Smile
When a hazing prank goes wrong, troublemaker Edward is thrown together with the unpopular daughter of the Police Chief. Bella Swan was the last person Edward was likely to fall for. But Bella has a lot to teach Edward about himself, love, life and loss. Twilight - Rated: M

Lights by Truthinvienna-rec'd by Jaime Arkin
It's shocking how fast your life can change. Happiness is fleeting, it's true. Dancing was my freedom, now it's a mere memory. A bad memory I can't escape. All I'm left with is insurmountable guilt and a pair of pointe shoes. Twilight - Rated: M

Oceans of Doubt by Belindella-rec'd by Nic
Everyone has secrets, but surfer-Edward's being swallowed by his. During a Mexican holiday with each other's family, Bella discovers as much about him as she does about herself. DADDYWARD. A coming of age, high school fic. AH/lemons Twilight - Rated: M

Of Kith and Kin by Chicklette-rec'd by Nic
"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love, and be loved in return." -Nat King Cole. This story is about that. AH, Canon pairings. Twilight - Rated: M

Off Piste by Landdownunder-rec'd by Lisa Hollett
Edward is a professional skier, Bella is an ex-Olympian still involved in the industry. They haven't seen each other since one memorable encounter a few years ago; now the Vancouver Winter Olympics will have them sharing the same slopes once again. AH Twilight - Rated: M

Operation Merry Christmas by nicnicd-rec'd by Jaime Arkin
When Bella, alone for Christmas, bumps into a shy and quiet coed outside of her dorm will her negative outlook on the Holidays change? My submission to the Twilight Gift Exchange on LJ.
Twilight - Rated: M

Plight Thee My Troth by Gingerandgreen-rec'd by Lamomo
England, 1795. Lord Edward Masen and Miss Isabella Swan promise to love one another for all time; but will the harsh realities of life allow two souls from very different backgrounds to fulfil their vows? EPOV, AH Twilight - Rated: M

Resisting Love by Just-a-crazyfanpire-rec'd by Mina Rivera
Scotland, 1152. He had never given his heart to someone. Not after his parents died right in front of him when he was only a child. Being forced by the king of his country to marry, he decides to fight the attraction to his bride. ExB Twilight - Rated: M

Restoration by Texbelle-rec'd by Mina Rivera
Ten years ago, circumstance interrupted their destiny. Now it's time for everyone to go back to Forks for their 10 year high school reunion to face their past with hesitation, hope and maybe even regret. Can they reclaim what was lost? All human. Twilight - Rated: M

Story of Us by x.Meg1509.x-rec'd by Kitty Vuitton
Edward Cullen is the newest editor at Cullen Publishing House NY. Single mum Bella moves to the city when she is hired as his assistant. All human. Canon couples. Rated M cause you never know what might happen. Twilight - Rated: M

The Naughty Elf by Twilly-rec'd by Obsmama/Jaime/Kitty etc
Santa believes there's no such thing as a bad elf. Bella's been fired from nearly every toy shop. How can Santa get her in the right position when everything out of her mouth is so very dirty? Santa, elves, chocolate starfish and phasing reindeer. Twilight - Rated: M

The Princess and the E by CLWN-rec'd by Kitty Vuitton
When Bella meets the mysterious 'E' he calls her his Princess and she's soon drawn into his dangerous world of organised crime. But this is no fairytale, so when Edward finds himself in trouble, it's up to his Princess to save him. OOC/AH. ExB AxJ RxEm. Twilight - Rated: M

Winter Song by Jessypt-rec'd by Jaime Arkin
Sometimes a Christmas miracle is nothing more than a second chance. A story told through Fictionista Workshop's Daily Witfits. Twilight - Rated: M 

Thursday, December 22, 2011

TLS Fics of the Week 12/22 - 12/28/2011

Here are the fab five fics, that moved us the most this week. Don't miss these great stories. There is something here for everyone. From all of us at The Lemonade Stand, we wish you all a Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanzaa and a Happy New Year to all of you!

Happy Holidays, Love TLS

Cliche by Suzie55
In a place far, far away lived a beautiful…oh, forget it. Who are we really kidding here? This is Hell. This is high school. Welcome to Forks. Bella X Edward AH - some humor though that's subjective. Twilight - Rated: M

Reviewed by: EvilNat

Cliché begins with Bella spending her Christmas break visiting her mother, Phil and her new step sister Rosalie.  Tired of being invisible, she enlists Rose to help make her over.  She has a mission to be noticed especially by Edward Cullen.

In a place far, far away lived a beautiful…oh, forget it. Who are we really kidding here? This is Hell. This is high school. Welcome to Forks.

I make my way through the crowd, bumping shoulders, seemingly invisible. How does one remain invisible in a school where she's attended all four years? In a town, where she grew up visiting every summer before that and played with most of these kids since we were toddlers? Well, this is my story and how I decided on the last day before Christmas break in my senior year that I would no longer be invisible.

After the break, Rosalie comes to live with Charlie and Bella in Forks; she helps Bella come out of her shell.  Her maturity and friendship help Bella survive her rising popularity.

"Remember, confidence is projected in different ways. It's not always about the words. Most of it's about the body language. She pulls into the far side of the lot between two vacant spots and parks at an angle taking up two of the three. She quickly turns toward me, a sympathetic smile on her face. "You can do this, Bella. You're better than you think you are and you're definitely better than they think you are." She cuts the engine and pulls the key. "Let's go prove it to them." With that, she gets out of the car.

I take a final deep breath and get out too, meeting her at the back of the car and we start to walk. I feel every eye on us, the pressure making my cheeks heat even though it's in the forties this morning. As we approach the sidewalk leading to the main front doors, Emmett steps forward.

"If I could have a moment of your time, I'd like to officially welcome you to Forks. Talk of your beauty and your car precede you. I'm Emmett McCarty."

Rosalie barely smiles, apparently not amused by the jock brigade greeting. She plays it like this is an old stunt she's heard a million times, but she's still polite. "Rosalie Hale. I'm new here."

"I would say so. And who is this pretty friend of yours?" he asks just as I see Edward walking up the stairs a few feet away.

We make eye contact but I drop mine quickly, all those old feelings for him rushing forward, the butterflies fluttering about, and my temperature instantly rising.

"Emmett, why surely you know Bella Swan?" Rosalie references back to me and smiles.

Emmett does a double take as Mike Newton comes in for a closer look and exclaims, "Holy shit! It's bird girl!"

Rosalie instantly steps forward, moving close to Newton's ear, a hand to his collar pulling him down towards her, and with a plastered smile and in a whispered tone, she says, "Don't ever call her that again or you will be eating your balls for breakfast. Do you understand me?"

"Yes," he gulps as she releases his collar, straightening it for him then turns back to Emmett.

"It was nice to meet you, Emmett. I'll be seeing you around I suspect."

"Your suspicions are correct," he says smugly.

The popular crowd in Forks High have a code.  A game where each boy can pick a girl to pursue, and when they are done the next in line is allowed to go after her.  If the girl chooses not to participate then they are out of the game and the boys move on.  Their pecking order is clear and they have an unspoken rule between them not to step out of line.

"These boys are trickier than I gave them credit for." She slides off the end of the bed and sits across from me on the floor so we're eye-level. "There's a code, a bond or something. They all play by a certain set of rules. They tag a girl and the others lay off of her. I must admit that it's quite organized and somewhat civilized for a group of high-schoolers."

"You got all that from one day at school? I'm impressed, Rose. That makes total sense too because Edward told me that he was my best bet."

"Yep, it's that damn code." She looks puzzled. "The problem is do they mark you and the others back off or do you have a say in the matter?" It's rhetorical, I can tell by how hard she's focusing on the ceiling, on solving this mystery.

The code thing whether it's a friend code or a team code or whatever surprises me though. It sounds civilized on the surface but it's really quite insulting that they get to tag you as theirs, verbally claim you in that way.

Edward doesn’t want to be part of the game anymore.  He likes Bella and had planned on making a move after the Christmas break.

I dig out my freshman, sophomore, and junior year yearbooks and crawl onto my bed. I flip open my ninth grade book and scan my finger across the pages until I find the S's. Saburn, Scott, Smith, Swan. Isabella Swan - brown hair, a little messy for picture day, headband, heavy looking sweater, and no make-up. She's cute. She doesn't stand out on the page and probably didn't back then. I don't remember much of her that year. I wonder if we had any classes together.

Tenth grade – the glossary says page eighty-seven and one-nineteen. I look at her school photo first. That might be the same headband from the previous year. It's hard to tell. She's wearing another bulky, too big for her sweater and a turtleneck. She's nothing if not practical for Forks weather. Her face seems similar – a late bloomer for sure, but cute. Page one-nineteen reveals she joined the yearbook staff. This is the book that has an abundance of pictures of me in it ironically. I think there were thirty-seven if I remember correctly. I shut this one and toss it aside.

In last year's book, I can see the girl she's become. Her hair is smooth with soft waves, she still doesn't have any make-up on, but she doesn't need it. Her eyes capture me, draw me in. They're brown. I know that just from seeing her at school, but the flash of the camera highlights something else in them, maybe gold, maybe green.

Edward’s only problem is it’s not his ‘turn’ to pick and since she’s come back from the break looking different and a lot hotter, Liam who is next in line, has set his sights on Bella for himself.

Edward also likes to bake pies when he’s down and needs to think which I really love, it’s just so anti-canon but it makes him even cuter.

I stop at the store and get the ingredients I know we need to make pumpkin pie. When I set it down in the kitchen, my mom looks at the bag and questions, "Pie?"

I hop on the counter, my shoulders drooping, feeling tired. "Yeah, I thought we could make it together."

She smiles at me and makes me feel like a kid and safe, comforted again. "We just had pumpkin at Thanksgiving. You sure you want this kind?"

"It's one of my favorites."

"Alright, the pie plates are in the cabinet behind your feet. Grab one out and help me make the crust."

As soon as the oven door closes, the two pies safely baking inside, she leans against the counter and asks, "You want to talk about it?"

She knows me too well. I should have gone for cake or cookies. Pie is my tell, my giveaway.

Will Edward and Bella get together, or will they let the weight of the ‘game’ get to them?

Suzie55 writes a witty, cute story about the pressures of high school.  It is relatively low in drama and very swoony when Edward and Bella hook up.  There are some great ‘villains’ and it is extremely entertaining.

Check it out!

Nat  xx

Footprints in the Snow by Cosmogirl7481
"An hour from now, when the snow falls again, it will be like we weren't even there. But we will remember." A story of unrequited love, and how the things we keep silent can hurt us and the ones we hold closest. E/B Rated M for themes of an adult nature. Twilight-Rated:M
Reviewed by: Jaime Arkin

This was important.

 These people were important.

And no matter what happened – where we all went or what we all did – these people would always be my family. Always.

Alice, Rosalie, Jasper, Emmett and Edward. Maybe the same blood didn't run through our veins, but they were more important than any blood. Like I said, they were my family.

Its no secret by now that I have a ginormous crush on the lovely cosmogirl7481.  She's written some of my favorite stories out there...filled with emotion, enchanting characters, hot, sexy citrus and believable plots.  Footprints in the Snow is no exception.  I'm incredibly lucky enough to get to be a pre-reader for her and I was immediately drawn into this story of unrequited love.

When we first meet Bella, she’s on her way to meet up with her family at their house in the mountains, where the kids spend the five days before Christmas together.  cosmo fills us in on their history and how this mix of kids became a big family through her memories –

I met them all the first year I was placed in the group home after Charlie and Renee died. With no living grandparents or other family members to take me in, I became a ward of the state of Washington. It's still hard to think about it that way, but that's exactly what I was. I didn't belong to anyone. Not even myself. I had no possessions to speak of. Just the sad brown backpack filled with the few clothes I'd packed before they took me from my home. Two pairs of jeans and three shirts.

From the first chapter we are shown how important Bella’s family is to her, having lost her parents and thinking that you are absolutely alone in the world makes her cherish her new family even more, not willing to share them with anyone else in her life, even someone who’s become important in her life.   

You immediately know that there is something between Edward and Bella, a history that is alluded to but not mentioned, but we don’t know the circumstances surrounding what it is or even the why, instead cosmo gives us readers a little bit more information with each and every chapter she posts.  We know Bella has someone in her life, but she keeps him at an arms length.  We find out why quickly in the second chapter.

The house was quiet. There were no sounds except for the occasional creak in the old floors. And I rolled over on my side and turned out the light on the nightstand. I breathed in deeply, allowing the chilled air to fill my lungs. And I pulled the quilts and blankets up around my neck and closed my eyes.

And that's when I felt it.

 Felt him.

 The air was cold on my back as he slid in bed beside me. But his body was immediately warm as he pressed up against the entire length of my own. His hands slid under the hem of my t-shirt, and as he rubbed my skin, he pressed his face against my neck, breathing in deeply.

My heart was pounding, and I wondered if he could feel it.

 "I wondered when you would come," I whispered into the dark.

 He pushed my hair back, running his nose up and along the shell of my ear. And then, soft and wet, he sucked the skin on my neck, while his hand slipped inside my panties…finding me…touching me.

 "I always come, Bella," he whispered. "Every year."

 Did I mention that Cosmo writes some of the hottest lemons around?

"Does it feel good?" he whispered, as he spread me open with his fingers.

 I could only nod my head because I knew if I tried to speak, it would be a moan. It would be loud and wanting. And in the silence of the house, I knew I couldn't allow it. Words didn't matter because I knew he could feel just how much I loved what he was doing. How much I wanted it.
How much I needed it.

 "You feel so good," he whispered again. "So wet for me…so, so…always so fucking tight."

 He continued to stroke me, his voice and breath all soft in my ear. I wanted to turn in his arms. I wanted to feel his mouth over mine. I wanted to taste him…to suck his skin…his tongue…his cock. But I let him hold me – let him take me wherever he thought I should go. At his pace. In his own way. Because in his arms, and under his hands, I knew I was safe. Knew I was protected. And even though it wasn't the way that I'd secretly always wanted…I knew I was loved.

 As if he could sense what I needed, he rolled me onto my back. He pushed my hands over my head, taking my shirt off slowly. And then he covered me – his naked skin on my skin – with the blankets falling heavy, over and around us. My hands wrapped around his neck, needing him closer than he was. But he held back for just a moment – looking in my eyes.

 His breath was labored and sweet. Just like everything about this stolen moment. And he reached up with one hand, cupping my face and stroking my cheek with his thumb.

 "What do you want?" he whispered. It sounded loud to my ears, as it bounced and reverberated off the cocoon of the covers.

 Finding my voice for the first time since I'd felt him in my bed, I gave him the only truth I was capable of saying out loud. "Whatever you want to give me."

 We find out that the secret hook-ups have been going on for eight years, every Christmas.  It’s heart wrenching to know how Bella feels about Edward, thinking he doesn’t return her feelings.  Her fear of causing awkwardness and discomfort for the rest of the family and their attempt to keep what was going on around them a secret weighs heavily on her, but she isn’t strong enough to give him up, to lose what little bit she can have of him.  This story is a testament to opening up and having a conversation, because as the story progresses, we learn so much about these two that simply could have been resolved if they hadn’t hidden their feelings and tried to play things cool, simply assuming they knew what the other wanted or needed.

I’m not going to give away too much more here, in fact, the chapters are short and the story should be complete around Christmas or shortly after so you must go give it a read.  I for one will miss the threads and texts filled with flails and the opportunity to talk my friends down off the ledge when cosmogirl7481 posts her updates.  Please go check out Footprints in the Snow and leave this incredible author some love.

Last Call by Robsmyyummy Cabanaboy
The past she's struggling to remember is the time he'd rather forget... Can they move beyond the scars and forge a new beginning together or have they missed their Last Call? AH, Rated M for language & eventual lemons. Twilight - Rated: M
Reviewed by: La Momo

Basic rundown: take the usual suspect and dump them in Loveladies, on the Jersey Shore. Edward is bartender, B&B and restaurant owner, and caterer. All this, split 50/50 with his handsome brother James.
Bella is in Loveladies because her "aunt" just died. Her very old, very rich, very philantropic aunt. The very aunt that helped Bella recover from a quasi deathly car crash, where she lost her parents and her memory.
And now she deals with another loss. Her aunt.
Picking up the pieces and trying to make them fall into place is not an easy task, especially when you remember jack with a side of squat about WHO you were BEFORE. Bella, along with Rosalie (her physical trainer and now her friend), do run into Edward at Last Call (the bar he owns), but Edward doesn't want anything to do with Bella, even if he remembers her drink of choice (Shirley Temple) down to the number of cherries. Might be because his days as a cabanaboy at the local country club were plagued by Bella's teenage bitchy behaviour and by her snotty parents?
Instead, the one who's interested in her is James. And of course, add to the mix that Edward can't stop thinking about her (despite the former bitchiness) but he currently has….a significant other (Tori, hair stylist on a mission).
Take all this, put it in a shaker, add some ice, two very intriguing narrators (Bella and Edward herself), shake it well, and you have the little gem that is Last Call.

I might be very inappropriately biased towards this story because I get to beta it. And I will never thank Suebee (the Beta Fairy) enough for asking me to take over when her schedule became overloaded with RL committments. First of all, because this beta'ing gig gave me as a collateral the immense gift of RC's friendship. She is an amazing person. Second, because I get to beta this story. Main reasons why you should drop everything and read? Follow at your own risk, you may develop an addiction….

The first piece of advice that aspiring writers get every day on god's green earth is "write about something you know", because research can only get you this far, and ultimately, it's feelings, not data, that you want to convey. And to do that, you need to know a place, a situation, or a person, in a very intimate way - its ins and outs, its quirks, upsides and flip sides. And if you do know that place, it shines through when you write.

This is one of the first things that strike you about Last Call. Our very own RC knows the Jersey Shore (the real, not the trashy one) and it shows in here. The rhythm of seasons, the set of people prowling the shore, the invisible social divides….between guests and a cabanaboy at a country club.
Second piece of advice you get is "find a voice" - each character is a real person, and should have a distinctive voice, just as each of us has in real life. We don't use the same set of phrases, the same vocabulary, the same metaphors, the same structures. And this, too, shines through in RC's writing.
Third, her writing and vocabulary are really articulate. Her descriptions, her adjectives and her phrases are quirky, funny, to the point, and just so refreshing. None of the "fic pet peeves" or syntax clogged by too many "you know's". And this is even BEFORE I get to work on them.
RC's writing is for real, and she has a clear image in her mind of where she wants to take this. And this, too, shines through. Page after page, she's laying the foundation of a layered, complex storyline, where two strong-willed people with strong feelings will be confronted by their own demons, uncertainties, and ill-hidden desires, as one of them learns everything from scratch, and the other needs to unlearn everything from scratch, because the former knows nothing and the latter…knows nothing right.

Follow them on their journey, and now shout up…I have a chapter to beta :)

My Beautiful Storm by Troublefollows1017
Weather-obsessed Bella finds Edward's journal, leading her on a trip down memory lane. Back then, Edward had run away, hoping to find a new purpose. Bella couldn't wait for her chance to escape, sure she knew what she wanted. Neither one expected this. Twilight - Rated: M
Reviewed by: Onebravelamb Fanfic

When I met you, I never imagined the impact you would have on my life. I didn't even really like you the first time we spoke. You were definitely not part of my big plan. I was running away. I was going to find my true happiness. What I didn't know was I found it that day at the beach. Hiding behind the most beautiful eyes I had ever seen and a know-it-all attitude was the person with whom I will spend the rest of my life.


I know, right? How completely adorable and gut-wrenchingly sweet is that?

That, my dears, would be troublefollows1017’s newest Edward. Well, it’s a letter he wrote to his Bella that she finds in a journal hidden under their bed.

Naughty, Bella. Such an invasion of privacy.

The story follows our favorite duo from the first time they meet, by way of Edward’s journal  and Bella’s memories spurred on by each entry. It’s a lovely way to glimpse into their past from both perspectives.

Bella, it seems, is an outcast. She has a fascination with weather and meteorology; she’s constantly spouting off random tidbits of information, much to the people who surround her chagrin. My guess is, being that they’re all high school students, they don’t see this as a defense mechanism, as a way to try and divert the attention off of herself.

They just think she’s weird.

But Bella doesn’t really seem to care, she thinks her fellow classmates are imbeciles anyway. She can’t wait to finish her high school career and leave Forks and all of its small-minded occupants behind.

Enter Edward, whom appears to be your quintessential jock at first glance.

Needless to say, it’s not a case of love at first sight.


"Were you trying to throw the ball at us or do you just have really bad aim?" I asked, ignoring his pretty face and his bright green eyes and his chiseled jaw and his tanned chest.

"I overshot it a little, I guess, but you have to admit that was a pretty amazing catch," he replied with some weird lopsided grin.

No apology. Nice.

"A little? More like a lot."

"If it had been off by a lot then Emmett wouldn't have been able to catch it. So, it must have been only off by a little."

"It was off by a lot."

"A little." He crossed his arms across his chest, making his forearms look really, really big.

"A lot," I continued to argue because the size of his arms was not going to distract me from being right.

Emmett decided to intervene."Bella, this is Edward, Rosalie's cousin. He moved in with the Cullens this summer kind of like I moved in with you last year. Edward, this is Bella Swan, my cousin." Em smiled brightly. "Hey, if Rose and I get married someday will that make you guys cousins?" His boisterous laughter did nothing to improve my mood.

"I hope not," Edward and I both mumbled at the same time. We then both arched a brow at the other. Good to know neither one of us wished to be related.

"Sorry for the sand shower. We'll try to stay on our side of the beach from now on. I promise."

"We absolutely promise. Wouldn't want to cause that stick to go any further up your ass. That could be painful," Edward said as the two of them jogged away. "Pleasure to meet you, Bella and her friend no one introduced me to!" He playfully punched at Emmett, who punched back, causing Edward to stumble a couple steps.


But there’s more to Edward than meets the eye, though even now at four chapters in, we’re all still wondering what makes up his past. The things we have learned so far are as follows: Edward was homeschooled until his senior year. His father had an obsession over his hands and keeping them safe. His father is a control freak. Edward plays the piano and has never been free to live his life as he wished.

He also claims to be able to predict the weather by simply feeling it in the air.

You can’t imagine how insane that makes Bella.

But it’s cute, because it’s obvious that Edward likes to ruffle Bella’s feathers and after spending a little time with the handsome boy with a questionable past, she doesn’t mind it so much when he does. In fact, it seems like she kind of likes it, even if it makes no sense to her whatsoever.

As I stated before, we’re four chapters into this incredible story and already these characters own me. Bella is snarky and odd, but incredibly endearing and Edward, well, he’s Edward. He’s sweet, charming and more than a little dorky himself. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve wanted to just reach into the story and pinch his cheeks.

Yes, he’s that adorable.

Only time will tell what’s in store for these two sweethearts, but I can tell you that I’m literally waiting on the edge of my seat for each update. Being the incredible author she is, troublefollows1017 has a set updating schedule and MBS hits inboxes each Friday. Much like her other incredible story, Fridays at Noon, used to.

I’ll leave you with a snippet from the latest update to whet your appetite.


Positive - Bella met me at my locker this morning and walked with me to first period. Negative - I will be devastated if she doesn't do it every day now.

Bella is so funny. She probably makes me laugh a hundred times a day. But I have to admit, I love it more when I make her laugh. She has this really cute giggle. Using the word cute probably makes me sound so lame, I know, but it is what it is. She's so damn adorable.

I'm pissed. Today is Bella's birthday, but no one told me until lunch, which is like halfway through the fucking day! I said, "I didn't know it was your birthday." She said, "Of course you didn't. Why would you?" I said, "I don't know. It just seems like something I should have known." She looked at me like I was a moron because obviously I am. I wished her a happy birthday because what else do you say to the girl you have a huge ass crush on when it's her birthday and you had no idea until it was too late to do something cool and interesting? She smiled. I'll take the smile.

Bella grabbed my arm today in physics. It was to stop me from writing something down, but still. She touched me. On purpose. Cue the dirty thoughts right there in class. What I wouldn't give for her to touch me on purpose for other reasons. I swear this girl has no idea what she does to me on a daily basis. I mean, I can tell she likes me. She smiles when I smile. She includes me when we're around her friends. It makes us friends, which is cool, but I don't usually have dirty thoughts about my friends. I have lots of dirty thoughts about Bella. A LOT.

I hate PE. My lack of experience in this area is becoming embarrassingly obvious. I've considered having Uncle Carlisle to write me a note excusing me from it because I think he totally would if I asked him. Hell, my dad would probably send me a damn note if I told him about the things they make me do with my hands in that damn class. But I keep thinking if I miss PE, I'd miss out on seeing Bella in those tiny shorts they make the girls wear. Those legs, that cute little butt are so worth the potential humiliation. Hello, dirty thoughts. Welcome back. Yeah, I think I'll stay in PE.

BEST DAY EVER. I've had a few moments in my life that stand out as major life moments. Moments that blow me away. Moments that I know I'll never forget because they affected me so deeply. Today, I had one of those moments. Today, Bella took me to play in the rain and I had the best time of my life. The whole thing was fun and crazy and something I never would have been able to do three months ago. But it wouldn't have been half as fun without Bella. Playing in the rain makes me think I have fallen hard for this girl. HARD. Today will be the day dirty thoughts take on a whole new meaning for me.


What are you waiting for? Go devour troublefollows1017’s words like I do and bask in the beautiful storm we’re all watching unfurl.

You won’t be sorry.



String Theory by theladyingrey42
"Eleven dimensions. Infinite parallel realities. And in all of them, I love her." Muppets, math, and physicists falling in love. Fluff and eventual lemons. ExB, AH. Twilight - Rated: M
Reviewed by: DiamondHeart78

Everyone knows my love of all Geekwards. When theladyingrey started posting her semi-short, daily updates featuring a super-sweet but sexy Edward (in glasses, once again. You KNOW how much I love my Edwards in glasses), I knew I would get stuck on the story like white on rice.

Theladyingrey is the kind of author who can write just about anything, and if you’ve read Our Lives Unbound and Love Amongst the Ruins, then you know she can go from angst to humor quite seamlessly. String Theory, although lighter in atmosphere, still retains a little of the uncertainty of life and love, which is the reason her readers keep reading.

Edward, a graduate student, spends most of his time at work pining over the equally (if not more) intelligent graduate student Bella Swan. Since it’s told in EPOV, Bella, seen through his eyes, is perfection in everything she does. The truth is she’s probably just as insecure and lonely as he feels. Edward’s crush is endearing, human and it makes you want to just hug him.

When he finally literally bumps into her for his perfectly schedule coffee break and introductory words are exchanged, we cheer for him. She’s sweet and charming and sparks fly rather quickly.

I found myself cheering for him quite a bit. Who wouldn’t cheer for the unlikely hero who happens to actually have some game? Boy’s got skills, making him the hot nerd of my fantasies. When the two finally go on their much talked-about date to get her disabled father out of the house, I’ve got my cheerleading outfit on, complete with pom poms.

And about halfway through the movie, I get a present of my own. While our hands have been joined all this time, as Kermit and Miss Piggy go on a romantic walk through the streets of Paris, I feel Bella shifting and leaning closer to me. At the same time, her thumb starts tracing out little arcs on the back of my hand.

My whole body takes notice. This is different. New.

This isn't the touch of a friend. It's more intimate than that. It's the touch of a…

I swallow hard.

Of a lover.

And that sparks a whole series of scenes in my head that have absolutely no business in a family film.

The world goes soft and dream-like, awash in a wave of desire so powerful it hurts, as I force myself to loosen up and touch her back. With gentle caresses, I feel her smooth skin beneath my fingertips. Beside me, she takes a deep, shivering breath.

Charlie coughs.

But neither of us pay him any mind.

The rest of the movie plays out in two parallel dramas – the one happening on the screen and the one happening right here in this seat. The one that's happening to me. My hand learns hers and she learns mine. By the time the closing number starts – a reprise of the same happy song from the beginning of the movie – I think I could recognize her by the shape of her knuckles alone.

This is where you hear the collective “aww” from the readers who I’m sure are totally rooting for Edward and Bella and their simple connection that has so much meaning.

Their relationship evolves to where it is at the moment, where they’re on another official date, sans parent and after a long week of studies, care-taking, and trips home to see family. They deal with the realities of graduate student life (endless studying, grading, and thesis prep) as well as the common fears and insecurities of going too fast or too slow in a new relationship.

Luckily, her daily updates are just long enough to make impatient readers happy and spoiled, so you won’t have to wait too long for your next Geekward fix. You’ll be rooting for him with me in my reserved cheering section too.
Pom poms optional. ;)

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Meet the Poll - Check out what we read in TLS this week:

A Drink With The Girls by CaraNo-rec'd by Nic
This is Bella's story. She loves her life. It's very uncomplicated… until she falls in love with the man she has a very pleasurable arrangement with. Silly, 'cause they have no reason to worry.
Twilight - Rated: M

Bear Valley Ranch by Lady Gwynedd-rec'd by Jedigirl SC
A continuation of The Mail Order Bride, picking up Edward and Bella's life in the Colorado frontier as their fortunes, their family and their loves grew. Twilight - Rated: M

Bohemian Rhapsody by Positively 4th Street-rec'd by VampsHaveLaws/Kitty Vuitton
It's War of the Office when corporate suit, Edward Cullen, clashes with his new assistant, free spirited bohemian, Bella Swan. Can two ends of a very opposite spectrum learn to work together... before they kill each other? AH.Twilight - Rated: M

Bright Like the Sun by Dryler-rec'd by Vampshavelaws
Edward/Bella - WIP, AU, AH, OOC. When Bella goes to live with her father in Forks, things go much better than she expected. At least until a slick parking lot, a careening van, a broken arm, and her weird lab partner from biology get in the way. Twilight - Rated: M

Feral by Opal aline-rec'd by Susan Q Susan
When Bella signed up for a summer archeology program, she thought she'd be exploring fossils and sedimentary rock. Little did she know, she would find herself the primary caretaker for a man with no verbal capacity or human interaction skills-a feral man
Twilight - Rated: M

Immortal Beloved by Elusivetwilight-rec'd by Jaime Arkin
'My thoughts go out to you, my Immortal Beloved, waiting to learn whether or not fate will hear us. I can live only wholly with you or not at all.' Newborn vampire Bella stumbles through the centuries to unlock what has happened to Edward. E&B Twilight - Rated: M

Insatiable Desires by ItzMegan73-rec'd by Kelli Knutzon
What happens when the paths of two highly intelligent hypersexuals cross?
Twilight - Rated: M

Kinky Christmas Countdown by Lfcpam-rec'd by Klrtwiluver Fanfiction
My very own pervy version of the 12 days of Christmas. Edward wants to give his wife, Bella, a Christmas to remember so he arranges a new kinky Christmas gift every night. Taken from their fantasies, Santaward has a whole sack full of surprises for her. Twilight - Rated: M

Level Up by Jokline14-rec'd by Tracy
Bella Swan, young, sassy and loaded, but no one really knows that but a few. Bella has everything she needs, including 2 very hot men, she rendezvous with. What happens when one man gestures with Poppies, Lilies and Hyacinths? Will she change her ways? Twilight - Rated: M

Mergers & Acquisitions by Touchstone67-rec'd by Mina Rivera
When Edward pays for a night of harmless fun, he didn't expect to get the purchase of a lifetime. Will his nights in Seattle change his whole life in Chicago? Full length story for the second place winner in the Slash/Backslash Contest. Rated M, J/E Twilight - Rated: M

Sacrifice by Twilight44-rec'd by Wendy Matthew
DISCLAIMER-reports of very strong/controversial themes, including rape, for this story. Please be advised before reading.
Young lovers Edward and Bella run away. Desperate choices and sacrifices will be made to keep them safe and to support themselves while on the lamb? How far will Edward go and what will the consequences be? Touching story of sacrifice in the name of love. Twilight - Rated: M

Six Weeks by Syrrah-rec'd by Jaime Arkin
I wonder how a story with no summary would go. Is anyone game to read it? Let's see...
Twilight - Rated: M

Skyping with Strangers by LazyMasochistBoot-rec'd by Peacock Stew
What happens when Bella accidentally starts up a Skype session with a complete stranger? Hilarity and silliness, of course. Oh...and maybe love? Lemons. Laughs. Continuation of the one-shot. Twilight - Rated: M

The Freaks and The Greeks by ThroughDeepBlueVelvetSkies -rec'd by SusanQ Susan
Volatile Bella Swan is thrown straight into a high school warzone; with vicious ice queens, strangely philosophical stoners, backstabbing giants and a hyperactive emotional neighbour - not to mention the stunning brother who seems to really hate her. AH
Twilight - Rated: M

The Other Twin by Symphiann-rec'd by Kitty Vuitton
Edward left home ten years ago over bad blood and angry words. Now a family tragedy brings him back to the place he swore to never return to. Will he find forgivness and maybe something a little more. AH, AU, CANON. Twilight - Rated: M

The Ride by Aylah50-rec'd by Obsmama
Bella and Edward meet at a concert as teenage strangers during the height of grunge in the 90's. When their paths cross 14 years later, Edward is stuck in the past while Bella is fleeing from hers.
Twilight - Rated: M

The Single Game by Awesomesauce76-rec'd by SusanQ Susan
New girl Bella Swan is finally ready to start dating again, but the only boy she's interested in is too shy to even talk to her. Why are her friends convinced that the answer to her problem is some crazy party game… with kissing? AU/AH, BPOV Twilight - Rated: M

This Heart Renewed by Orchidmoon22-rec'd by Kitty Vuitton
9 years ago Bella Swan had a surgery that saved her life. A humble survivor, she is making a life for herself in a new town. Along the way she meets Edward Masen. Quiet, dark, cold, angry. Can she bring him back to life? Or will the truth ruin it all? Twilight - Rated: M

Worth the Burn by My-Bella-rec'd by Evilnat
A night of Halloween trickery & secrets leads to some unexpected treats for Bella. Will this night of debauchery be a one time occurrence? Or will Bella & Edward risk the burn and attempt a relationship? Rated "M" for mature language & situations. Twilight

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Lemony Snippets: A Series of Delightful Holiday Drabble Recs!

LEMONY SNIPPETS for December 2011

Hey, lovely ladies and gents of TLS... With the holidays fast approaching us, Kitty and I have decided to give you all a few holiday drabbles to read that are quick, easy and fun. (Thanks, Kitty, for all you have done to get this post ready to go).
Kitty and I will be back after the New Year with more Lemony Snippets for your pleasure. We hope you all have a safe and wonderful holiday and a Happy New Year as well.  See you in 2012...

Hugs and Kisses,

I Remember December by Cara No - Rec'd by Kitty Vuitton
Growing up is never easy. For some, it's even harder. But if you have that special someone, the bad fades away. Edward remembers… and this is his story.

This beautiful love story between Edward and Bella definitely has me reaching for the tissues in the beginning. Both young children when they first meet during Christmas on the roof of their apartment, they share a bond that is unbreakable. They come from broken homes where their parents care more about themselves, leaving Edward and Bella to raise themselves. Soon though their friendship turns into more, and they know that nothing can stand in their way of finding true happiness. Troubled waters lie ahead for these two but with the love they have for one another, they can conquer just about anything. This is a holiday drabble you wont want to miss.

Holidays in Aspen by CullenTwiMistress
Ughh, two weeks with Cockblocker Cullen, Angela, I'm going to die." Bella and Edward aren't exactly friends but will the holidays bring them together? BxE. Rated M for l&l. Drabble

My Santa Savior by JA Mash
Bella has had the year from hell... how can a random visit to Santa with her niece offer her the prospect of a Happy New Year? A Holiday Drabble in Bella's POV...

Christmas Nuts by risbeencoldplaywhore
A story so wrong, it will make you miss the Christmas Shoes song.

The Curious Tale of my Curiosity by Welcometomyworldxoxo
They say curiosity killed the cat, but I disagree because my curiosity led me to him, and it didn't kill me. In fact, it did quite the opposite. A Christmas drabble about a girl and boy, and throwing caution to the wind. Mature. ExB Drabble fic.

Cavalcade by Luluvee
Love blooms under fireworks and twinkle lights, crystals strung on satin, and boughs of fragrant pine. Fluffy, Christmassy drabble fic. E/B AH

The Naughty Elf by Twilly- Rec'd by Kitty Vuitton
Santa believes there's no such thing as a bad elf. Bella's been fired from nearly every toy shop. How can Santa get her in the right position when everything out of her mouth is so very dirty? Santa, elves, chocolate...

This funny little drabble has me bent over laughing at all of the sexual innuendo that come from Bella's naughty mouth, and the thoughts running through Santa's mind. It is most definitely the funniest holiday drabble I've read, and I cannot wait to see what naughty things come out of Bella's mouth tomorrow!

Thursday, December 15, 2011

TLS Fics of the Week 12/15 - 12/21/2011 Reviews are up!

Need a guaranteed  good read? Here ya go.  Any of these five fantastic features right here should do the trick. You voted, we agreed and now we hope that you'll dig into these lemony delights. Have a great weekend everyone!

Glimmer Darkly by Rochelle Allison - rec'd by PAWsPeaches
She loses him almost as soon as she finds him... but things aren't always what they seem. Will Bella follow her heart down the rabbit hole? AU-ish.

Reviewed By: ModernSafari1

I love a good mystery. I love when an author sucks you into a story by teasing you with morsels of information at such a leisurely pace that it makes you want to trade in every favor you are owed just to get the next chapter. Glimmer Darkly is a story about first love, heartache and healing, clouded in secret. It flows between past and present providing you with just enough information to keep you sucked into the story and waiting on the edge of your seat for more. Of course, from their first fated meeting one night in a bar it is clear Bella and Edward have an innate connection.

The band announced that they were taking a break. Something Top 40 filled the airspace instead. My gaze drifted back to Edward.

Nice profile, a straight nose and maybe-freckles. Green eyes; he was looking at me.

Slightly embarrassed, I looked past him, as if I'd been staring at the wall he was standing next to. But my eyes were back on him before I realized it. He smiled a little and turned back to his friends.

Either my thoughts were loud or he was a mind reader, because he turned and looked at me, his face barely visible. I could almost feel his indecision. Or decision; he turned and came over to me.

"I'm Edward."

I nodded. "I'm Bella."

He looked down, smiling. "I… saw you. Inside."

"I know," I said, biting my lip. Smiling, shaky. "I saw you see me."

Bella and Edward spend that first summer together getting to know one another; both reeling from first dates and first kisses and first I love you’s. On his last night in Forks, before he leaves on a Doctors Without Borders mission, Edward surprises Bella with a romantic evening right in his own backyard.

Gasping, I took in the scene, hardly able to believe that Edward could possibly be any more perfect. Why did he have to go? Why? I felt like I'd just found him, only to have him yanked away too soon. But it was only temporary, and I resolved to make the most of our time apart. Absence makes the heart grow fonder and all that, which was probably bullshit, but it sounded good and so I clung to it.
And lust. Edward's hands had been wandering all night, but he'd kept it PG-13 until now. While I was fully onboard with Edward's reasons for saving ourselves, I'd worn a skirt expressly so that things could escalate easily. Maybe I'd stopped trying to convince him long ago, but I had no problem tempting him.
He crawled on top of me, kissing and nipping at my throat. I wrapped my legs lazily around him, resting my bare feet on his calves. Sweet turned to hot, and our kisses grew deeper, longer and more intense. He ground against me almost automatically, instinctively. We'd gotten to this point before, sometimes even letting it ride until we came, but this time Edward dragged himself down my body and yanked my panties to the side.
Opening my eyes in surprise, I propped myself on my elbows, half sitting up to see if he was doing what I thought he was. Then his eyes met mine, and he was smiling… and going down on me.
I collapsed back on to the blanket, panting with pleasure, fisting his hair. This was the first time he'd done this to me, and I started quivering under his tongue soon after he began.

However, when Edward goes missing just months into the mission, Bella is stuck in limbo and unable to move forward in life without her soul mate; she is suffering a broken heart from his disappearance. She’s also convinced herself that she’s hearing and seeing things lurking in the woods outside her home. It’s something she senses in the air around her without being able to fully grasp what it could possibly be that gives her such a feeling of unease.

Subtle but certain, it's back...this creepy feeling. It's the feeling of turning out the light and walking down the hall and just knowing something's there in the dark. The woods make me feel this way, and that saddens me because those woods used to be home. I played in them all the time as a kid but now? No. And damn it's been bad lately, at its worst when the day's light is fading, twilight smothering the last bits of afternoon sun.

Whatever it is, it's palpable tonight, thick and silent; even the normal evening sounds of rustling trees and voices drifting from the guesthouse are gone.

It's followed me for months–ever since that summer ended, taking everybody I loved along with it.

Ever since the night I awoke to breaking glass, to blood-soaked sheets.

Without closure, of knowing what could have possibly happened to Edward, Bella goes through the necessary motions of daily life but puts college plans on hold. It’s the unyielding heartache that she still has not figured out how to deal with, even after months of trying. Bella can’t let go of Edward. Not yet. Maybe not ever. She has this indescribable awareness of him and has convinced herself that he is still alive. After all, he did promise that he’d come back to her.

I retreat to my bedroom, closing the door quietly behind. This is where I decompress, where I can drop the mask. Some days are crying days, but other times, like tonight, I'm numb. I'm not sure which is worse, but either way I sleep a lot more than I used to.

Every thought of him is a stomach ache. His name is forever needling at me, refusing to be forgotten. He's every song on the radio every love interest in every book, every subtle reference of every poem.

Some nights, late, I Google his name, trying to find news that may not have gotten to Forks yet. People say "no news is good news" but that's a damn lie. No news is no closure, and that's me walking around, holding on to my middle so the inside of me doesn't fall out.

Bella’s unconscious keeps her connected to Edward in a way she doesn’t quite understand; with dreams that she can’t explain once she wakes, a feeling so tangible it almost seems real.

I'm running in the woods.

It's freezing cold, like autumn or even winter, made colder by how fast I'm going, so fast my feet barely touch the forest floor. It's like flying.

And then, stillness. Floating, maybe.

I love you

I love you, too

Do you?

Sadness seeps in. It's different. I normally find peace in this dream.

I do

Then why aren't you here?

You'll hate me

Gasping, I wake up. I'm trembling so hard it hurts.

Across my room, the curtains flutter softly.

Okay, so I’ve tried to not give too much information away. The story deserves to be read exactly how it was written without spoilers from me. I think there may be more bumps in the road ahead but what’s life without a few bumps, right? Give it a read, you will not be disappointed. Of course, you can’t be disappointed reading anything written by Rochelle.

The Cellar by IamBeagle-rec'd by Rochelle Allison
Boy meets Girl. Girl's friend throws up on Boy's shoes. A story about wannabe hipsters, awkward moments and soul mates. Twilight - Rated: M

Reviewed By: Rochelle Allison

The Cellar is pretty perfect, in my opinion. At a time when drabble fics seem to be all the rage, this one manages to not only use the format in a way that actually works, it shines. The brief chapters feel like indie vignettes, not longer chapters that were butchered in to smaller ones.
I almost didn’t read it, mainly because I was judging a book by its cover…rather, a fic by its summary. The mention of hipsters had me running for the proverbial hills until a friend of mine explained what was up and encouraged me to read anyway. I was so glad I did, because the story isn’t about the coolness of hipsters, but rather the silliness of.

"I'm a hipster, Edward," Ben said with a dramatic sigh. "I need canned beer, sarcasm and preferably an outdoor patio."
"Hipsters generally don't refer to themselves as 'hipsters', do they?"
Ben shrugged. "Can I borrow one of your ties?"
"Yeah, but it's not from a thrift store. Won't that go against your hipster ways?"
"It's fine. This cardigan is from J Crew, anyway," he yelled as he walked down the hall towards my room. "After I figure out how to tie this fucker, we're doing shots then heading out!"
I sat back on the couch and dropped my head into my hands. A few minutes later, I grabbed my hooded jacket and keys and waited for Ben by the front door.
"On a scale from one to Michael Cera, how hipster do I look?" Ben asked seriously.
"Don't ever ask me that again."

This story manages to be sweet but not saccharine, clever but never pretentious. The dialogue is sharp and witty, the interaction between characters so honest. The whole thing is in EPOV, and he feels very genuine, like how a sweet, intelligent and yet sexy guy would actually be.

Bella is also quite refreshing as well. She obviously likes Edward (and we late find out just how much, to both her surprise and his) but she’s so no simpering giggler. Instead, she gives as good as she gets, one of the reasons this fic had me laughing so hard at times. Their chemistry is as intellectual as it is physical.

"I think it's safe to say you've surpassed my level of weirdness. Oh, and that silly nickname better not stick, you hear me, Puffy Nuts?"
"I hear you," I told her as I entwined our fingers.
A few minutes later, the cab driver dropped us off in front of Kerbey Lane. Surprisingly, Ben paid the driver as Bella and I attempted to help a groggy Kate out of the cab.
"Pancake face time?" She asked as I shut the door behind her.
"Yes. Exactly." Bella laughed and walked ahead with Kate before looking around. "Shit, her purse."
I looked back as the cab pulled away from the curb then ran the few feet after the cab before pounding my first on the back window to catch his attention. He didn't like that very much and used a few choice words, but I grabbed the purse and jogged back over to the parking lot.
"God. That was very heroic of me and no one saw?" I asked as I noticed Bella standing alone.
"They just walked inside. I'll be sure to announce to the restaurant that you're brave and deserve a medal though."
"You'd do that for me?" I teased and handed her Kate's purse.
"Of course I would. Just add it to the list, right after shanking your friend," she shook with laughter as I stepped closer, towering over her.
"Hey," I whispered and brought both hands to her face.
"Is this the part when you kiss me?" she asked as I leaned down closer to her mouth.
"Yes," I laughed quietly, lips hovering over hers. "If that's okay. I'm already here so I might as well follow through. And I remembered not to mention Kelly Clarkson, so that's good."
"Yeah, that is good," she said as her chest heaved with anticipation.
"Alright. Here goes," I said and pushed my lips against hers. We stayed still for a moment before our lips began to move together frantically. Her hands suddenly found my hair and I groaned as I moved one hand down to her hip, bringing her closer to me. Her lips were soft, chapstick soft, and she pulled on my hoodie, releasing a small moan. She was the first to pull away and I stared down at her with hooded eyes, smiling at the redness around her mouth and chin from my scruff.
"I can't even lie right now. You're not terrible at all," she admitted and I kissed her once more.
"So, the tongue was good?"
"The tongue was amazing."
"So...pancake face time?" I asked, grabbed her hand and pointed towards the restaurant.
"Yeah. Pancake face time."

Also, as an aside, any fic that incorporates cheesy lyrics as part of the ongoing banter has my vote. Anytime.

"So?" Heidi pushed for information while squeezing a lemon slice into her glass.
"It doesn't matter so much where we met, but what matters is what was said," Bella explained as I poured her a glass of beer.
"It all happened very organically. I mean, I walked over to her and the first thing I said was..." I trailed off, stared at Bella and waited for her to take the lead.
"I remember exactly what he said," she began seriously. "He was like, 'Now I'm not tryin' to be rude, but hey pretty girl I'm feelin' you. The way you do the things you do reminds me of my Lexus coup'," she said conversationally.
The lack of reaction from Heidi and Alec gave me time to wrack my brain to figure out why the hell what Bella had just said sounded so familiar. I watched her lips twitch and she bumped my shoe with hers. Then it hit me: lyrics. She was fucking quoting an R Kelly song. An extremely catchy R Kelly song.
"That's why I was all up in her grill tryin' to get her to a hotel?" I asked with a grin, causing Bella to nod animatedly. "I thought she was a football coach the way she had me playing the field."
"We were sippin' on coke and rum and I was like 'so what? I'm drunk'..."
"It was the freaking weekend and we had fun. Then we bounced," I added.
"Bounced. Bounced. Bounced," Bella finished, looking entirely too pleased with herself.
"You said all of that? To her? The first time y'all met?" Heidi asked, staring at me then Bella.
"Pretty much." I let out a sigh. "Yeah."
Bella nuzzled into my side. "What can I say? Dude's got good game."

See? It doesn’t take itself too seriously. I love that.

So, I’m going to follow in the tradition of this succinctly fab story and not be too overly verbose in my review. Read The Cellar. It’s not long, and it’s packed with little gems of greatness.

She Gives Me Religion by Liz Lemon Bennett - rec'd by Lynn Pepper
Hot-headed seminary student, Edward Masen meets just widowed bride Bella Swan. EPOV: AU/AH Started as O/S. Now expanded.

Reviewed By: Lynn Pepper

Some might say it is a bit taboo, a seminary student taking a widowed bride to bed the first night he meets her, but in this case it might just be divine intervention.

This story starts on the day that should be the happiest in a girl’s life.  Bella has been widowed in a car crash on the day she is to get married.  Edward comes to help and falls irrevocably in love with her.   What struck me the most in the very first chapter is Edward’s inner monologue, which is also how he frequently talks to God.

“Running through the parking lot, I focus through prayer, "Lord, help me to be your instrument on this important day. Guide me to assist Carlisle as we do your work in your name. Help me to tame my temper—SHIT!" A car passes too closely and splashes water over my jeans. "Watch it asshole!" I yell at the distancing car. Fortunately my Oxford shirt stays dry. I need to look half-decent for today. "Sorry, God—where was I? Oh yeah, help me to tame my temper…"

He struggles with the idea of keeping professional when his thoughts are far from it.  He eventually gives in to those feelings though, and it is just the beginning of an emotional roller coaster ride.

"Kiss me again, Edward," she whispers.
"I…your lip…"
"It doesn't hurt." She's so calm, so confident, and I'm so… so unworthy. She reaches her hand to the nape of my neck and gently massages the back of my head. Saliva pools in my mouth. I lean in and kiss her. She's so soft and warm. I take her upper lip in mine, flavors of milk and Captain Crunch, and Bella. My brain shuts down and my libido takes over. Her mouth opens wider and I enter her. Her tongue, soft, meets mine and follows into my mouth. She sucks on my bottom lip, I hum in appreciation.
I move my hand to her neck and rub my thumb over her jaw. I let my hand fall to her shoulder, and then caress her collarbone. She moans in my mouth. Bella pulls the pillow out from between us and throws it behind her without breaking our kiss, but I pull back.
"Bella, this is dangerous." I'm out of breath and fully turned on.

Edward is suffering from a traumatic past as well as Bella, but he is in some serious denial.  This leads them both to have an insecure and even overly obsessive, unhealthy relationship.  You can just watch and wait, knowing they can’t hold on for long.

Both Edward and Bella have demons in their pasts they must fight to overcome.  It isn’t just a simple tale of boy meets girl.  This Edward may have a temper, but he has a heart the size of the sun.  He loves her in the way canon Edward loved Bella.  Watching this Bella go from being grief-stricken to actually putting forth great effort into her own recovery is a refreshing change.

Besides Bella and Edward, we meet Carlisle and Esme, Edward’s mentors and guardians. This Alice is absolutely someone I would want for a best friend and Jasper is the perfect compliment to Edward.

I love how this is a story about two broken people who try and forge a relationship that seems doomed from the start.  We journey with them on their road to healing.  Liz has done an incredible job making these characters believable and relatable.

The lemons in this story are a tribute to that.  They are hands down some of the hottest lemons I have read, but yet she has kept it real.  Just like sex in real life, it is messy and imperfect and sometimes even used as a weapon against the person we love.

This story is nearing completion and I will be sad to let these characters go, but I have enjoyed every word and, no matter how it ends, it has been totally worth it.

Vagina Monologues by Jtmd24-rec'd by Jaime Arkin
What happens when 2 strangers have a 1-night-stand in college? Life. But not the way you planned. It's raising a foul-mouthed toddler, selling sex toys & trying to make your dreams come true. Oh, and running into your drunken hook-up 5yrs later. AH/AU
Twilight - Rated: M

Reviewed By: FictionFreak95

OK so, JT’s sense of humor in this fic made me laugh so hard sometimes, I thought I’d pulled something.  I'm not even fibbing one little bit.

She had me at “Bullshit” ~

I never planned on ever pushing a human out of me and turning my vagina into a pile of roast beef that no man would ever want look at, let alone bang.

Let's face it: no one was ever honest with you about child birth, not even your mother.

"It's a pain you forget all about once you have that sweet bundle of joy in your arms."


And her retelling of how Bella and Edward… got it on… was killing me.

Penises talked like pirates when I was drunk. Probably because Alice called them one-eyed snakes. And pirates wore patches and only had one eye and...holy shit, Captain Hookpenis was coming closer.

And is extremely honest about Bella’s “first time before she heads off into the real world” experience…

I wanted it to last forever. I saw stars, came three times that night and it was the most beautiful experience of my life.

Yeah right. Are you fucking kidding me? Have you lost your virginity lately? It hurts like a motherfucker and it's awkward and messy.

She of course finds out she’s preggers shortly thereafter… and comes to the conclusion that she should tell this guy but – he’s gone… finito, nowhere to be found… queue hilarious single mother raising potty mouthed Mason. (LOVE)

And then of course, we get to see Edward’s side of “the next morning” *DED* ~

"My dick is bleeding. Emmett – MY DICK IS BLEEDING!"

And Emmett’s response to Edward’s woahs…

"Calm down. Let's assess the situation," Emmett said, crossing one leg over the other and folding his hands on his knee. "Have you noticed any of the following: unidentified discharge, burning sensation when you urinate, lower abdominal pain, testicular pain, pain during sex, fever, headache, sore throat, weight loss, chronic diarrhea or night sweats?"

Once over his morning after "freak out"... Edward slowly realizes what actually happened the night before… he’d taken someone’s virginity…  someone had willingly, let him drunkenly taken her virginity and it really screws with his head... So, being the awesome Edward that he is… he seeks her out… to apologize… to get her number… to do… something… but doesn’t find her…

So the two of them spend the following years – always wondering about each other, never really moving forward with either of their lives…  Bella, because she has this awesome kid (and might I add, a freaking awesome Charlie too! *zips lips on that one*)… Edward because he compares every girl to his one night stand.

Until they run into each other again unexpectedly - and then it REALLY gets fun!

Not only did I absolutely love how JT takes a one night stand and turns it into the funniest, sweetest love story ever… but the fact that she continuously reminds me of all the crazy moments from when my own *coughs* sweet girls were just toddlers was icing on the cake.

Check it out, laugh your ass off, then leave her love, because as I’ve said before, JT is good people.


Fold Your Wings by Jadalulu - rec'd by Robsmyyummy Cabanaboy
The liberties he assumes with my body should enrage me,anger me, beyond my sanity. But it's just not that simple. Encounters born of need. Consequences niether saw coming. Guard your hearts. Not the ExB you're used to.

"I have a proposition for you, Isabella."

Robert Redford, Demi Moore and Woody Harrelson thought THEY were dealing with an indecent proposal?? Pssshhhhhh. They don’t KNOW from indecent proposals! Ladies and gentlemen…I give you; or rather Jadalulu gives you, Roughward.

If there were ever a textbook definition of the act of “burning the candle at both ends” this Bella’s 8x10 glossy would be right there next to it. In ‘Fold Your Wings’ by Jadalulu, Bella is a full time college student by day and by night she is a maid in a five star hotel. If that isn’t enough she waits tables on the weekends, as well. It isn’t unheard of for Bella to function on three hours of sleep on some nights.  She’s running herself ragged in order to make ends meet until one day a very sexy, very mysterious, and very cocky Edward saunters into her world:

"I believe you'd be interested in what I have to say. I'm a business man. And I'd like to make a deal with you, Isabella."

His eyes are different now. Instead of the lighter blue from before, they seem dark, a steel gray.

They drop to my lips...


My chest...


My legs...

I'm still wearing my knee length maid's skirt and I feel exposed, fidgety under his stare. I try to tuck my legs out of sight, but it's too late. He's gotten his eyeful. Red flags and alarm bells and whistles galore in my head.

…"Mmm...yes. I would venture to say you were very interested. Tell me, Isabella, do you want to hear what I have to say?"

His voice has dropped to a forceful whisper.

His arrogance is so astounding that you have to remember to close your mouth which is surely agape at this point. And while you’re at it, grab a napkin to dab at the side of your mouth lest you fry your keyboard due to drool spillage.

…"Are you relapsing back into little words again? Because if that's easier for you, I can oblige. I'm nothing if not accommodating. You. Me. Fucking."

He's speaking slowly and pronouncing every word like I'm a child. And it's enough to snap me out of my stupor.

"I don't know who the fuck you think you are or- "

 Am I ever going to get a full statement out with him?

"Who I am is someone offering you an opportunity to do something that requires very little effort on your part and will compensate you greatly. Five hundred dollars a night, Isabella. You show up, we fuck, then go on our merry way. What part of this isn't win/win for everyone? I'm not interested in a relationship or getting to know you."

And so begins Bella’s sordid arrangement with Edward. Encounter after encounter, Bella is left with more questions than answers as to who Edward really is and why he behaves as he does. Though she desperately needs the money, she is forever warring with herself to stop this madness and quit whoring herself out to him. Ultimately though, she cannot shake her growing desire to be with Edward and the gnawing questions that she has about what drives him to be such a bastard.

Edward may have approached me. He may be paying me to provide a 'service' for him. I may hate the crude words that fall from his mouth every time it opens. He may be a selfish, miserable, misogynistic asshole who takes and takes without concern for me. But it doesn't mean that our arrangement can only benefit him.

Because tonight...I took too.

Soon however, situations present themselves where Bella finds herself working as an event planner for the very family with whom Edward no longer has contact.  Bella is perplexed by the divide, but she is thrown into the middle of an upcoming wedding and is rattled to her core when the connection between Edward and the Cullen/Hale/Brandon family is made. It would be easiest if she could forget about all of them…but circumstances are beyond her control. She has yet to sever her arrangement with Edward and she must follow through with this wedding as it is vital to her career path:

He leans forward and over my ear. "Beg me. Beg for my cock, Isabella. Beg for me to fuck you."

I don't need to be facing him to see the cocky smirk on his face. He reaches forward with his free hand and twists my nipple roughly, pulling and tugging at it. The sharp sting isn't as unpleasant as it's intended to be.

And then I'm mad. Mad at myself for being in this situation. Mad at him for being such an asshole. Mad at Alice for saying all of the shit that she did. For contributing to the mountain of questions that I fight off thinking about every day. Furious at myself for the nanosecond of disappointment I felt when I thought of getting back on that elevator and going home without having done what I came here for.

I latch onto the anger and let it carry me through what I'm about to do.

You will find ‘Fold Your Wings’ on Jada’s blog at , not on Jadalulu will have you on the edge of your seat with your heart in your throat and your stomach in knots during EVERY BLESSED CHAPTER. You simply must take this journey; every update brings a little more insight but leaves you with even more questions. Isn’t that the way all phenomenal stories should be told? You won’t be sorry. Do it. Do it now. Roughward will NOT be kept waiting. ;)

Reviewed By: Robsmyyummy Cabanaboy