Thursday, December 15, 2011

TLS Fics of the Week 12/15 - 12/21/2011 Reviews are up!

Need a guaranteed  good read? Here ya go.  Any of these five fantastic features right here should do the trick. You voted, we agreed and now we hope that you'll dig into these lemony delights. Have a great weekend everyone!

Glimmer Darkly by Rochelle Allison - rec'd by PAWsPeaches
She loses him almost as soon as she finds him... but things aren't always what they seem. Will Bella follow her heart down the rabbit hole? AU-ish.

Reviewed By: ModernSafari1

I love a good mystery. I love when an author sucks you into a story by teasing you with morsels of information at such a leisurely pace that it makes you want to trade in every favor you are owed just to get the next chapter. Glimmer Darkly is a story about first love, heartache and healing, clouded in secret. It flows between past and present providing you with just enough information to keep you sucked into the story and waiting on the edge of your seat for more. Of course, from their first fated meeting one night in a bar it is clear Bella and Edward have an innate connection.

The band announced that they were taking a break. Something Top 40 filled the airspace instead. My gaze drifted back to Edward.

Nice profile, a straight nose and maybe-freckles. Green eyes; he was looking at me.

Slightly embarrassed, I looked past him, as if I'd been staring at the wall he was standing next to. But my eyes were back on him before I realized it. He smiled a little and turned back to his friends.

Either my thoughts were loud or he was a mind reader, because he turned and looked at me, his face barely visible. I could almost feel his indecision. Or decision; he turned and came over to me.

"I'm Edward."

I nodded. "I'm Bella."

He looked down, smiling. "I… saw you. Inside."

"I know," I said, biting my lip. Smiling, shaky. "I saw you see me."

Bella and Edward spend that first summer together getting to know one another; both reeling from first dates and first kisses and first I love you’s. On his last night in Forks, before he leaves on a Doctors Without Borders mission, Edward surprises Bella with a romantic evening right in his own backyard.

Gasping, I took in the scene, hardly able to believe that Edward could possibly be any more perfect. Why did he have to go? Why? I felt like I'd just found him, only to have him yanked away too soon. But it was only temporary, and I resolved to make the most of our time apart. Absence makes the heart grow fonder and all that, which was probably bullshit, but it sounded good and so I clung to it.
And lust. Edward's hands had been wandering all night, but he'd kept it PG-13 until now. While I was fully onboard with Edward's reasons for saving ourselves, I'd worn a skirt expressly so that things could escalate easily. Maybe I'd stopped trying to convince him long ago, but I had no problem tempting him.
He crawled on top of me, kissing and nipping at my throat. I wrapped my legs lazily around him, resting my bare feet on his calves. Sweet turned to hot, and our kisses grew deeper, longer and more intense. He ground against me almost automatically, instinctively. We'd gotten to this point before, sometimes even letting it ride until we came, but this time Edward dragged himself down my body and yanked my panties to the side.
Opening my eyes in surprise, I propped myself on my elbows, half sitting up to see if he was doing what I thought he was. Then his eyes met mine, and he was smiling… and going down on me.
I collapsed back on to the blanket, panting with pleasure, fisting his hair. This was the first time he'd done this to me, and I started quivering under his tongue soon after he began.

However, when Edward goes missing just months into the mission, Bella is stuck in limbo and unable to move forward in life without her soul mate; she is suffering a broken heart from his disappearance. She’s also convinced herself that she’s hearing and seeing things lurking in the woods outside her home. It’s something she senses in the air around her without being able to fully grasp what it could possibly be that gives her such a feeling of unease.

Subtle but certain, it's back...this creepy feeling. It's the feeling of turning out the light and walking down the hall and just knowing something's there in the dark. The woods make me feel this way, and that saddens me because those woods used to be home. I played in them all the time as a kid but now? No. And damn it's been bad lately, at its worst when the day's light is fading, twilight smothering the last bits of afternoon sun.

Whatever it is, it's palpable tonight, thick and silent; even the normal evening sounds of rustling trees and voices drifting from the guesthouse are gone.

It's followed me for months–ever since that summer ended, taking everybody I loved along with it.

Ever since the night I awoke to breaking glass, to blood-soaked sheets.

Without closure, of knowing what could have possibly happened to Edward, Bella goes through the necessary motions of daily life but puts college plans on hold. It’s the unyielding heartache that she still has not figured out how to deal with, even after months of trying. Bella can’t let go of Edward. Not yet. Maybe not ever. She has this indescribable awareness of him and has convinced herself that he is still alive. After all, he did promise that he’d come back to her.

I retreat to my bedroom, closing the door quietly behind. This is where I decompress, where I can drop the mask. Some days are crying days, but other times, like tonight, I'm numb. I'm not sure which is worse, but either way I sleep a lot more than I used to.

Every thought of him is a stomach ache. His name is forever needling at me, refusing to be forgotten. He's every song on the radio every love interest in every book, every subtle reference of every poem.

Some nights, late, I Google his name, trying to find news that may not have gotten to Forks yet. People say "no news is good news" but that's a damn lie. No news is no closure, and that's me walking around, holding on to my middle so the inside of me doesn't fall out.

Bella’s unconscious keeps her connected to Edward in a way she doesn’t quite understand; with dreams that she can’t explain once she wakes, a feeling so tangible it almost seems real.

I'm running in the woods.

It's freezing cold, like autumn or even winter, made colder by how fast I'm going, so fast my feet barely touch the forest floor. It's like flying.

And then, stillness. Floating, maybe.

I love you

I love you, too

Do you?

Sadness seeps in. It's different. I normally find peace in this dream.

I do

Then why aren't you here?

You'll hate me

Gasping, I wake up. I'm trembling so hard it hurts.

Across my room, the curtains flutter softly.

Okay, so I’ve tried to not give too much information away. The story deserves to be read exactly how it was written without spoilers from me. I think there may be more bumps in the road ahead but what’s life without a few bumps, right? Give it a read, you will not be disappointed. Of course, you can’t be disappointed reading anything written by Rochelle.

The Cellar by IamBeagle-rec'd by Rochelle Allison
Boy meets Girl. Girl's friend throws up on Boy's shoes. A story about wannabe hipsters, awkward moments and soul mates. Twilight - Rated: M

Reviewed By: Rochelle Allison

The Cellar is pretty perfect, in my opinion. At a time when drabble fics seem to be all the rage, this one manages to not only use the format in a way that actually works, it shines. The brief chapters feel like indie vignettes, not longer chapters that were butchered in to smaller ones.
I almost didn’t read it, mainly because I was judging a book by its cover…rather, a fic by its summary. The mention of hipsters had me running for the proverbial hills until a friend of mine explained what was up and encouraged me to read anyway. I was so glad I did, because the story isn’t about the coolness of hipsters, but rather the silliness of.

"I'm a hipster, Edward," Ben said with a dramatic sigh. "I need canned beer, sarcasm and preferably an outdoor patio."
"Hipsters generally don't refer to themselves as 'hipsters', do they?"
Ben shrugged. "Can I borrow one of your ties?"
"Yeah, but it's not from a thrift store. Won't that go against your hipster ways?"
"It's fine. This cardigan is from J Crew, anyway," he yelled as he walked down the hall towards my room. "After I figure out how to tie this fucker, we're doing shots then heading out!"
I sat back on the couch and dropped my head into my hands. A few minutes later, I grabbed my hooded jacket and keys and waited for Ben by the front door.
"On a scale from one to Michael Cera, how hipster do I look?" Ben asked seriously.
"Don't ever ask me that again."

This story manages to be sweet but not saccharine, clever but never pretentious. The dialogue is sharp and witty, the interaction between characters so honest. The whole thing is in EPOV, and he feels very genuine, like how a sweet, intelligent and yet sexy guy would actually be.

Bella is also quite refreshing as well. She obviously likes Edward (and we late find out just how much, to both her surprise and his) but she’s so no simpering giggler. Instead, she gives as good as she gets, one of the reasons this fic had me laughing so hard at times. Their chemistry is as intellectual as it is physical.

"I think it's safe to say you've surpassed my level of weirdness. Oh, and that silly nickname better not stick, you hear me, Puffy Nuts?"
"I hear you," I told her as I entwined our fingers.
A few minutes later, the cab driver dropped us off in front of Kerbey Lane. Surprisingly, Ben paid the driver as Bella and I attempted to help a groggy Kate out of the cab.
"Pancake face time?" She asked as I shut the door behind her.
"Yes. Exactly." Bella laughed and walked ahead with Kate before looking around. "Shit, her purse."
I looked back as the cab pulled away from the curb then ran the few feet after the cab before pounding my first on the back window to catch his attention. He didn't like that very much and used a few choice words, but I grabbed the purse and jogged back over to the parking lot.
"God. That was very heroic of me and no one saw?" I asked as I noticed Bella standing alone.
"They just walked inside. I'll be sure to announce to the restaurant that you're brave and deserve a medal though."
"You'd do that for me?" I teased and handed her Kate's purse.
"Of course I would. Just add it to the list, right after shanking your friend," she shook with laughter as I stepped closer, towering over her.
"Hey," I whispered and brought both hands to her face.
"Is this the part when you kiss me?" she asked as I leaned down closer to her mouth.
"Yes," I laughed quietly, lips hovering over hers. "If that's okay. I'm already here so I might as well follow through. And I remembered not to mention Kelly Clarkson, so that's good."
"Yeah, that is good," she said as her chest heaved with anticipation.
"Alright. Here goes," I said and pushed my lips against hers. We stayed still for a moment before our lips began to move together frantically. Her hands suddenly found my hair and I groaned as I moved one hand down to her hip, bringing her closer to me. Her lips were soft, chapstick soft, and she pulled on my hoodie, releasing a small moan. She was the first to pull away and I stared down at her with hooded eyes, smiling at the redness around her mouth and chin from my scruff.
"I can't even lie right now. You're not terrible at all," she admitted and I kissed her once more.
"So, the tongue was good?"
"The tongue was amazing."
"So...pancake face time?" I asked, grabbed her hand and pointed towards the restaurant.
"Yeah. Pancake face time."

Also, as an aside, any fic that incorporates cheesy lyrics as part of the ongoing banter has my vote. Anytime.

"So?" Heidi pushed for information while squeezing a lemon slice into her glass.
"It doesn't matter so much where we met, but what matters is what was said," Bella explained as I poured her a glass of beer.
"It all happened very organically. I mean, I walked over to her and the first thing I said was..." I trailed off, stared at Bella and waited for her to take the lead.
"I remember exactly what he said," she began seriously. "He was like, 'Now I'm not tryin' to be rude, but hey pretty girl I'm feelin' you. The way you do the things you do reminds me of my Lexus coup'," she said conversationally.
The lack of reaction from Heidi and Alec gave me time to wrack my brain to figure out why the hell what Bella had just said sounded so familiar. I watched her lips twitch and she bumped my shoe with hers. Then it hit me: lyrics. She was fucking quoting an R Kelly song. An extremely catchy R Kelly song.
"That's why I was all up in her grill tryin' to get her to a hotel?" I asked with a grin, causing Bella to nod animatedly. "I thought she was a football coach the way she had me playing the field."
"We were sippin' on coke and rum and I was like 'so what? I'm drunk'..."
"It was the freaking weekend and we had fun. Then we bounced," I added.
"Bounced. Bounced. Bounced," Bella finished, looking entirely too pleased with herself.
"You said all of that? To her? The first time y'all met?" Heidi asked, staring at me then Bella.
"Pretty much." I let out a sigh. "Yeah."
Bella nuzzled into my side. "What can I say? Dude's got good game."

See? It doesn’t take itself too seriously. I love that.

So, I’m going to follow in the tradition of this succinctly fab story and not be too overly verbose in my review. Read The Cellar. It’s not long, and it’s packed with little gems of greatness.

She Gives Me Religion by Liz Lemon Bennett - rec'd by Lynn Pepper
Hot-headed seminary student, Edward Masen meets just widowed bride Bella Swan. EPOV: AU/AH Started as O/S. Now expanded.

Reviewed By: Lynn Pepper

Some might say it is a bit taboo, a seminary student taking a widowed bride to bed the first night he meets her, but in this case it might just be divine intervention.

This story starts on the day that should be the happiest in a girl’s life.  Bella has been widowed in a car crash on the day she is to get married.  Edward comes to help and falls irrevocably in love with her.   What struck me the most in the very first chapter is Edward’s inner monologue, which is also how he frequently talks to God.

“Running through the parking lot, I focus through prayer, "Lord, help me to be your instrument on this important day. Guide me to assist Carlisle as we do your work in your name. Help me to tame my temper—SHIT!" A car passes too closely and splashes water over my jeans. "Watch it asshole!" I yell at the distancing car. Fortunately my Oxford shirt stays dry. I need to look half-decent for today. "Sorry, God—where was I? Oh yeah, help me to tame my temper…"

He struggles with the idea of keeping professional when his thoughts are far from it.  He eventually gives in to those feelings though, and it is just the beginning of an emotional roller coaster ride.

"Kiss me again, Edward," she whispers.
"I…your lip…"
"It doesn't hurt." She's so calm, so confident, and I'm so… so unworthy. She reaches her hand to the nape of my neck and gently massages the back of my head. Saliva pools in my mouth. I lean in and kiss her. She's so soft and warm. I take her upper lip in mine, flavors of milk and Captain Crunch, and Bella. My brain shuts down and my libido takes over. Her mouth opens wider and I enter her. Her tongue, soft, meets mine and follows into my mouth. She sucks on my bottom lip, I hum in appreciation.
I move my hand to her neck and rub my thumb over her jaw. I let my hand fall to her shoulder, and then caress her collarbone. She moans in my mouth. Bella pulls the pillow out from between us and throws it behind her without breaking our kiss, but I pull back.
"Bella, this is dangerous." I'm out of breath and fully turned on.

Edward is suffering from a traumatic past as well as Bella, but he is in some serious denial.  This leads them both to have an insecure and even overly obsessive, unhealthy relationship.  You can just watch and wait, knowing they can’t hold on for long.

Both Edward and Bella have demons in their pasts they must fight to overcome.  It isn’t just a simple tale of boy meets girl.  This Edward may have a temper, but he has a heart the size of the sun.  He loves her in the way canon Edward loved Bella.  Watching this Bella go from being grief-stricken to actually putting forth great effort into her own recovery is a refreshing change.

Besides Bella and Edward, we meet Carlisle and Esme, Edward’s mentors and guardians. This Alice is absolutely someone I would want for a best friend and Jasper is the perfect compliment to Edward.

I love how this is a story about two broken people who try and forge a relationship that seems doomed from the start.  We journey with them on their road to healing.  Liz has done an incredible job making these characters believable and relatable.

The lemons in this story are a tribute to that.  They are hands down some of the hottest lemons I have read, but yet she has kept it real.  Just like sex in real life, it is messy and imperfect and sometimes even used as a weapon against the person we love.

This story is nearing completion and I will be sad to let these characters go, but I have enjoyed every word and, no matter how it ends, it has been totally worth it.

Vagina Monologues by Jtmd24-rec'd by Jaime Arkin
What happens when 2 strangers have a 1-night-stand in college? Life. But not the way you planned. It's raising a foul-mouthed toddler, selling sex toys & trying to make your dreams come true. Oh, and running into your drunken hook-up 5yrs later. AH/AU
Twilight - Rated: M

Reviewed By: FictionFreak95

OK so, JT’s sense of humor in this fic made me laugh so hard sometimes, I thought I’d pulled something.  I'm not even fibbing one little bit.

She had me at “Bullshit” ~

I never planned on ever pushing a human out of me and turning my vagina into a pile of roast beef that no man would ever want look at, let alone bang.

Let's face it: no one was ever honest with you about child birth, not even your mother.

"It's a pain you forget all about once you have that sweet bundle of joy in your arms."


And her retelling of how Bella and Edward… got it on… was killing me.

Penises talked like pirates when I was drunk. Probably because Alice called them one-eyed snakes. And pirates wore patches and only had one eye and...holy shit, Captain Hookpenis was coming closer.

And is extremely honest about Bella’s “first time before she heads off into the real world” experience…

I wanted it to last forever. I saw stars, came three times that night and it was the most beautiful experience of my life.

Yeah right. Are you fucking kidding me? Have you lost your virginity lately? It hurts like a motherfucker and it's awkward and messy.

She of course finds out she’s preggers shortly thereafter… and comes to the conclusion that she should tell this guy but – he’s gone… finito, nowhere to be found… queue hilarious single mother raising potty mouthed Mason. (LOVE)

And then of course, we get to see Edward’s side of “the next morning” *DED* ~

"My dick is bleeding. Emmett – MY DICK IS BLEEDING!"

And Emmett’s response to Edward’s woahs…

"Calm down. Let's assess the situation," Emmett said, crossing one leg over the other and folding his hands on his knee. "Have you noticed any of the following: unidentified discharge, burning sensation when you urinate, lower abdominal pain, testicular pain, pain during sex, fever, headache, sore throat, weight loss, chronic diarrhea or night sweats?"

Once over his morning after "freak out"... Edward slowly realizes what actually happened the night before… he’d taken someone’s virginity…  someone had willingly, let him drunkenly taken her virginity and it really screws with his head... So, being the awesome Edward that he is… he seeks her out… to apologize… to get her number… to do… something… but doesn’t find her…

So the two of them spend the following years – always wondering about each other, never really moving forward with either of their lives…  Bella, because she has this awesome kid (and might I add, a freaking awesome Charlie too! *zips lips on that one*)… Edward because he compares every girl to his one night stand.

Until they run into each other again unexpectedly - and then it REALLY gets fun!

Not only did I absolutely love how JT takes a one night stand and turns it into the funniest, sweetest love story ever… but the fact that she continuously reminds me of all the crazy moments from when my own *coughs* sweet girls were just toddlers was icing on the cake.

Check it out, laugh your ass off, then leave her love, because as I’ve said before, JT is good people.


Fold Your Wings by Jadalulu - rec'd by Robsmyyummy Cabanaboy
The liberties he assumes with my body should enrage me,anger me, beyond my sanity. But it's just not that simple. Encounters born of need. Consequences niether saw coming. Guard your hearts. Not the ExB you're used to.

"I have a proposition for you, Isabella."

Robert Redford, Demi Moore and Woody Harrelson thought THEY were dealing with an indecent proposal?? Pssshhhhhh. They don’t KNOW from indecent proposals! Ladies and gentlemen…I give you; or rather Jadalulu gives you, Roughward.

If there were ever a textbook definition of the act of “burning the candle at both ends” this Bella’s 8x10 glossy would be right there next to it. In ‘Fold Your Wings’ by Jadalulu, Bella is a full time college student by day and by night she is a maid in a five star hotel. If that isn’t enough she waits tables on the weekends, as well. It isn’t unheard of for Bella to function on three hours of sleep on some nights.  She’s running herself ragged in order to make ends meet until one day a very sexy, very mysterious, and very cocky Edward saunters into her world:

"I believe you'd be interested in what I have to say. I'm a business man. And I'd like to make a deal with you, Isabella."

His eyes are different now. Instead of the lighter blue from before, they seem dark, a steel gray.

They drop to my lips...


My chest...


My legs...

I'm still wearing my knee length maid's skirt and I feel exposed, fidgety under his stare. I try to tuck my legs out of sight, but it's too late. He's gotten his eyeful. Red flags and alarm bells and whistles galore in my head.

…"Mmm...yes. I would venture to say you were very interested. Tell me, Isabella, do you want to hear what I have to say?"

His voice has dropped to a forceful whisper.

His arrogance is so astounding that you have to remember to close your mouth which is surely agape at this point. And while you’re at it, grab a napkin to dab at the side of your mouth lest you fry your keyboard due to drool spillage.

…"Are you relapsing back into little words again? Because if that's easier for you, I can oblige. I'm nothing if not accommodating. You. Me. Fucking."

He's speaking slowly and pronouncing every word like I'm a child. And it's enough to snap me out of my stupor.

"I don't know who the fuck you think you are or- "

 Am I ever going to get a full statement out with him?

"Who I am is someone offering you an opportunity to do something that requires very little effort on your part and will compensate you greatly. Five hundred dollars a night, Isabella. You show up, we fuck, then go on our merry way. What part of this isn't win/win for everyone? I'm not interested in a relationship or getting to know you."

And so begins Bella’s sordid arrangement with Edward. Encounter after encounter, Bella is left with more questions than answers as to who Edward really is and why he behaves as he does. Though she desperately needs the money, she is forever warring with herself to stop this madness and quit whoring herself out to him. Ultimately though, she cannot shake her growing desire to be with Edward and the gnawing questions that she has about what drives him to be such a bastard.

Edward may have approached me. He may be paying me to provide a 'service' for him. I may hate the crude words that fall from his mouth every time it opens. He may be a selfish, miserable, misogynistic asshole who takes and takes without concern for me. But it doesn't mean that our arrangement can only benefit him.

Because tonight...I took too.

Soon however, situations present themselves where Bella finds herself working as an event planner for the very family with whom Edward no longer has contact.  Bella is perplexed by the divide, but she is thrown into the middle of an upcoming wedding and is rattled to her core when the connection between Edward and the Cullen/Hale/Brandon family is made. It would be easiest if she could forget about all of them…but circumstances are beyond her control. She has yet to sever her arrangement with Edward and she must follow through with this wedding as it is vital to her career path:

He leans forward and over my ear. "Beg me. Beg for my cock, Isabella. Beg for me to fuck you."

I don't need to be facing him to see the cocky smirk on his face. He reaches forward with his free hand and twists my nipple roughly, pulling and tugging at it. The sharp sting isn't as unpleasant as it's intended to be.

And then I'm mad. Mad at myself for being in this situation. Mad at him for being such an asshole. Mad at Alice for saying all of the shit that she did. For contributing to the mountain of questions that I fight off thinking about every day. Furious at myself for the nanosecond of disappointment I felt when I thought of getting back on that elevator and going home without having done what I came here for.

I latch onto the anger and let it carry me through what I'm about to do.

You will find ‘Fold Your Wings’ on Jada’s blog at , not on Jadalulu will have you on the edge of your seat with your heart in your throat and your stomach in knots during EVERY BLESSED CHAPTER. You simply must take this journey; every update brings a little more insight but leaves you with even more questions. Isn’t that the way all phenomenal stories should be told? You won’t be sorry. Do it. Do it now. Roughward will NOT be kept waiting. ;)

Reviewed By: Robsmyyummy Cabanaboy

1 comment:

  1. Holy hell. Thank you SOOOOO much for this review. You should see my face. My cheeks hurt from the smiling. It always blows me away to hear that people keep an open mind about, and are enjoying, this story.

    Thanx to every Roughian that voted and to everyone at TLS, especially Robsmyyummy Cabanaboy for her write up of FYW. You guys make a girl feel so special.