Bella Swan hates Rosalie Hale. Her idea of revenge? Sleeping with the Ice Queen's boyfriend, Edward Cullen. AH, very OOC, very rated M. Twilight - Rated: M
Review by : VampsHaveLaws
Anyone who knows me knows I'm an angst girl, through and through. That doesn’t mean I don’t read and love other genres, because I do, I just have an emo loving heart and don’t always fall in love with them as strongly.
Good Deal by m7707 is one, however, that I did.
The prologue was smart and funny, full with a Bella that had a lot of attitude.
The last thing in the fucking world I wanted to do with Cullen was talk to him. I had better uses for his mouth.
Needless to say this captured my attention.
Good Deal is nine chapters in length, well written and seriously one of the cutest stories I have ever read. It’s fun and naughty and everything a good fic should be.
The basic scenario is as follows:
Bella hates Rosalie. Rosalie hates Bella. Every time Rose pisses Bella off, she fucks Edward. Hence, Good deal.
"You're Edward, right? Edward Cullen?"
"You're dating Rosalie Hale?"
He grimaced. "Fucking Rosalie."
Ohh, trouble in paradise. I smiled.
He looked me over. "We're kind of on and off. This happens to be an off week."
"Excellent." I grabbed his hand and pulled him behind me as I headed toward the parking lot. "Come with me."
"Where?" He followed along willingly enough.
I paused when we reached the edge of the lot, biting my lip. My truck was at one end, but the cab was small and the steering wheel huge. It didn't leave a lot of room.
"Which one's your car?"
He pointed at a shiny, brand new, sleek, and expensive looking sedan. "The Volvo. Why?"
Perfect," I said in satisfaction. I bet it had a nice back seat. Probably leather, too, which made it easy to clean. He looked like he'd be messy.
Um…" He let me yank his arm as I marched purposefully toward the car. "Mind if I ask what we're doing?"
Getting into the backseat of your car." I looked around. There were a few vehicles still left in the lot, but they were mostly staff cars parked in the back. His sat all by itself in shiny silver solitude.
I came to a sudden halt, spinning to look at him. He managed to avoid knocking me flat on my ass in an admittedly graceful move that left him towering over me. I hadn't realized how tall he was.
"Do you want a blowjob or not?" I asked irritably, grabbing his hand once again and pulling him toward the car. Why was he making this so difficult?
Now, Rose pisses Bella off a lot; so naturally Bella and Edward get to spend a lot of time in the bedroom, in the woods, in their cars. It’s a win-win for them both. But sex isn’t always as uncomplicated as you expect, and what starts off as merely fun—merely a way to get your rocks off with the pretty green-eyed boyfriend of your nemesis—turns into more. They get to know each; their likes and dislikes and not just the touch of their fingers or the feel of their lips. Feelings grow, intense feelings, and before they know it they’ve fallen. Hard. And Rosalie is no longer an excuse to keep meeting up.
"Tell me what you want," I whispered when he lifted his head for a second.
We stared at each other, panting, lips heavy with wanting to touch again. I'd asked him before in the throes of passion, and he me—many, many times—but he knew that time was different. He knew, in that way he had, in the way he was starting to know me, that I was asking about something more. And that was kind of scary.
He was silent for a few minutes, and I felt him shift above me as he put the condom on. He never took his eyes from mine, so when he whispered, "You," I knew he wasn't just talking about by body. Sex. Fucking. Even making love, although for the first time, we both thought maybe that was a part of what was between us.
He entered me but still didn't look away. Not when he moved, not when I matched him, not when I came and he gritted his teeth, the tendons in his neck straining, the vein in his forehead throbbing, trying to hold on as I came again, not when he gasped and rocked and cried out with his orgasm. Only when the pulses stopped, the contractions slowed, and the strength in his arms gave out did he close his eyes and kiss me. And kiss me and kiss me.
"What do you want, Bella?" he asked sometime later, when we were stirring, knowing we had to leave the bed and get dressed, go back to the real world.
I stopped and stared at him, wondering if anyone had ever asked me that before. I looked at him, really looked, and saw him, the real him, the one he kept hidden from everyone at school. The one I only ever saw when he was alone with me.
"You," I blurted, and knew that was exactly what I wanted. "I want you. I want you to not sleep with your fucking girlfriend any more."
Now, this scares the crap out of Bella. This wasn’t part of her plan, wasn’t part of the deal.
But does she give all this up, or does she kick that fear in the butt and embrace it?
I’ll let you find that one out by yourself.
m7707 captures teenage emotions perfectly and shares with us a quick and addictive read, one that you won’t regret reading.
So if you wanted to go check this awesome little fic out, all I’d have to say to you is:
Strange Brew by Magnolia822-
Soon-to-be college senior Bella Swan needs a summer job. Edward Cullen needs a worker for his new tasting room at Cullen Creek Brewery. She doesn't know much about beer, but she knows how to push his buttons. Romance/Humor, ExB, M for Lemons/Language
Twilight - Rated: M
Review by: DIAMONDHEART Fanfiction
When asked to review Strange Brew by Magnolia822, I immediately jumped at the chance. See, aside from being my beta and a good friend, she’s an AMAZING writer. Truly. Her other stories, The Cullen Sutras, A Quiet Fire, and An Acquired Taste are regularly readers’ most talked-about fics, and Strange Brew is no exception.
Edward and Emmett, are brothers and owners of Cullen Creek Brewery in Burlington, Vermont. All is well until Edward’s estranged wife finally leaves him and files for divorce. Four months later, their business is booming-- so much so, that they must hire extra help to run the tasting room, a new addition to the brewery.
Enter young Bella Swan, college junior. She’s desperate for a job, and Emmett quickly hires her to work the tasting room.
Of course, sparks fly when Edward and Bella finally meet, but careful and apprehensive Edward forces himself to stay away for fear of his future ex-wife’s retribution. She has the ability to take everything he’s worked so hard to create.
Bella at first has no knowledge or experience regarding beer and its complicated process. Edward, at first annoyed with having to train Bella, soon realizes he’s in over his head:
"Alright. So. This first beer you tried last time... do you remember?" I pick up the bottle of the Hefeweisen.
"Um, yeah," she says. "It was only three days ago."
"Good. This time I want you to try it with this..." I slide over the glass and the package of strawberries. Bella plucks one up and brings it to her lips, and a bit of juice dribbles down her chin. Before I can tell her she reaches for a napkin, blushing and wiping her face.
"Mmmmmm," she murmurs appreciatively. "That's really nice."
"Hefe is a light beer, so it goes well with fruits, sweet things, seafood. I know you don't eat mussels, but it's pretty fucking awesome with those too. And I like it with nuts."
Bella takes another bite of strawberry and another sip of the beer. "I bet you do."
I think I'm finally realizing that Bella has quite a dirty mind. Her sense of humor is a little immature, but I like it. Fuck!
And after going through a bit more of the tasting, we get this delicious little bit:
"It's... not too bad," she hedges. "It's grassy... a little fruity. Very hoppy."
"Bella, it's fine for you to have your own personal preferences—just don't tell the customers you think it sucks." I pass her the bag of chips and a jar of hot salsa, and Bella surprises me by scooping up an enormous amount of the stuff on a chip before I can warn her how hot it is. She smiles and makes an appreciative noise before reaching for another.
"This actually makes it better. I love hot stuff," she says.
"I can see that. Well, anyway, IPA goes really well with any kind of spicy food since the bitterness of the hops stands up the heat. You should really learn to like it."
"Yeah, I'll work on that."
Bella tries the Raspberry Wheat beer next and smiles. I can see her flavor preferences more clearly now. She likes malty, dark beers and lighter, fruity, less hoppy ones.
"Now this, I like. I drink this down at the pub all the time."
This surprises me. "You do?"
"Yeah, it's my favorite."
"No, I mean, you go down to the pub... my pub?"
"All the time... with Alice."
"I've never seen you there before, goat girl."
Bella scowls a little, and then her cute blush is back. Fucking hell... I'm starting to love making her blush, even though right now it isn't intentional.
"Yeah, well..." I want to know what she's going to say, but she doesn't finish. Instead, I slide the plate of goat cheese and fig baguettes over to her. She looks at me with mock horror. "You don't really expect me to try one of these, do you?"
I nod, picking one up and popping it in my mouth. "Yep."
"You really are cruel."
"Hey, I told you I was an asshole when you took the job."
"Take one bite, chew, and swallow. Now that's an order."
"I will—if you promise not to call me goat girl."
"I'll stop calling you goat girl if you don't like it. And the only way you'll know is if you try. It's called a compromise."
"Fuck." She closes her eyes and holds her nose, bringing the bread to her mouth and taking a tentative bite. It's amazing watching her expression shift from complete disgust to confusion and, finally, to delight. She opens her eyes in surprise.
"You like it. I told you."
"Shit. I... do. It's..." She takes another bite, larger this time, and then washes it down with a sip of beer. "Honestly, it's nothing like I thought it'd be. It's so creamy... a little tart... it doesn't taste like goats. And the honey and the fig... that's just really good."
I try not to be too pleased with myself, but I allow myself a small smirk. "Good. Well, this shit goes perfectly with the Raz Wheat. And if you tell customers about it, they'll think you're a genius."
"I am a genius."
"And modest too."
She smiles a little, picking up another piece of baguette. "Does this mean you're still gonna call me... you know... that?"
"Only in private," I say before I can stop myself. Bella raises her eyebrow. What the fuck is wrong with me?
Right? RIGHT? And Magnolia822 always manages to create make her main characters’ hobbies and professions sexy as hell (see The Cullen Sutras and An Acquired Taste). Her writing style is just so easy-flowing that the story’s pace is just right.
I have a tendency to skim areas in stories with too many descriptives, which ends up making me stop the flow of my reading. That doesn’t happen AT ALL with Mags’ stuff. I want to read every single word and soak up all the sexiness that oozes out of all her Edwards, in particular THIS Edward. Mags is so, so good at capturing a true male’s POV, focussing on how men REALLY think and behave.
Edward and Bella traverse different hurdles and complications which have the potential to wreck their budding relationship. But I won’t give anything away. You’re just going to have to read it! Tell Magnolia DH sent you!
Teacher of the Year by DiamondHeart78-rec'd by Jaime Arkin
When Bella has a chance encounter with a sexy stranger, she never believes she'll see him again. Fate however, has a sense of humor. AH/ExB Twilight - Rated: M
Review by: JO FICFREAK :)
Hi, my name is Jo.
I like fic.
I like fic with a good plot, deep characters and yeah, maybe some angst along the way.
That’s right, I said it. I like a little drama between my Bellas and Edwards just as much as the next chica.
HOWEVER. Funny is always my go to, it seems. And I mean that as in, I still like fic with a good plot and deep characters – but after crying my eyes out over some of best written stuff out there… I also like to find good plots and deep characters in the humor genre… I like to read about a Bella and Edward who have somewhat of a sense of humor. Ya know what I mean? Because life isn’t one hundred percent of the time over the top depressing, that’s all I’m sayin’.
I need a little fluff N stuff to balance out the heart wrenching tear jerkers, in other words.
And this, my friends, is why I love DiamondHeart78’s fic, “Teacher of the Year”.
She takes a situation that could obviously have just as easily been angsty and made it into one of the funniest, sweetest story lines I’ve read in a while.
My take: Bella moves back to town with her son (Garrett) after getting up and getting out of a very messy “relationship”. Soon thereafter, she goes out with her girls and gets drunk off her ass at the local bar (grandma's watching Garrett, don't worry). She meets a guy. She drools over said guy. She proceeds to make out with him. And oh yeah, he is one seriously, sexy Edward but alas, in due time of this hot and steamy make out session with the guy she thought she'd never in a million years meet... she's pulled away from him abruptly... time to go, says Alice (grrrr) – and hence, Bella was never afforded the chance to give him her number… or get his.
"You're fucking beautiful." My eyes roll back. His voice is sex.
"So are you," I respond, mirroring his action and feeling his hand snake its way around my waist, gripping tight. He's on the verge of unleashing something.
Unleash away, Edward. Unleash away.
She is just getting to where she is pretty much accepting the fact that she won’t ever see Mr. Perfectly Sexy, Excellent Kisser again when she takes her son to his first day of Kindergarten… and meets his new teacher… who’s none other than Mr. Perfectly Sexy, Excellent Kisser, Edward Cullen! Who. Wears. Glasses. (did I mention that?) - He's like Clark Kent. Responsible, fun loving teacher by day... Ridiculously sexy, funny, hot, man of Bella's dreams by night.
"Hi. I'm Mr. Cullen. You must be Garrett's mom, I'm pleased to meet y…"
And there it is. I turn just in time to meet his glance.
He's frozen. I'm frozen. There's a bouncing five-year-old holding my hand. I slowly lift my other hand to offer a tiny wave.
The situation they are in is so freaking cute and funny and sexy and funny and adorable and not to mention their kids are FANTASTIC.
Oh, and Lauren plays a pretty funny role in this one too. You will love to hate this woman.
"Here we go," Angela mutters under her breath, which makes me stop to look up.
Edward turns to Lauren who practically skips towards him, plastic boobs unmoving. No bounce to them. Do men actually like tits that don't move? I guess if they're that big they could give a shit.
"Yes, Ms. Mallory?"
"I just wanted to let you know," she says all breathy and stuff, stepping closer until her hand lingers on his chest, her fake nails, airbrushed with unicorns, contrasted against his shirt.
And what is that smell? Is that her perfume? I think my nose just died.
"I'm available for room mom duties... whenever you need me." She says the last line puckering her glossy lips, eyelashes aflutter.
Cue eye roll.
You won’t regret this one. I promise. Diamond is a pretty great lady, to boot, so get on over there and give it a go, leave her some love and then send me Edward wrapped up all pretty like with a bow (or ten) over top of his gorgeous… well, you get the picture, as a small token of your thanks.
Unrequited by Perry Maxwell - rec'd by Robsmyyummy Cabanaboy
Edward left Bella almost a year ago, upending her whole world. What happens when Bella receives a phone call that just might shatter it? "Wait, Alice…Edward is dying?" I choked out.
Twilight - Rated: M. AH. BPOV
Review by: ROBSMYYUMMY CABANABOY & CEJSMOM TWIFAN (Guest Reviewer)
Change throughout a lifetime is inevitable. Sometimes you're ready for it and sometimes you have no say in it, no matter how much you may protest. You have to live through it, survive it; before you realize that you’re allowed to feel some emotion about it, or more importantly, even have an opinion on it.
In Perry Maxwell’s “Unrequited”, change is a running theme. Whether the characters want it or not, lives shift and decisions are made leaving many people struggling in the wake. Some changes are voluntary, and others are thrust upon unsuspecting characters who are just barely keeping it together. You have your health, and then suddenly you don’t. You have your marriage, and then suddenly you don’t. You have acceptance and then suddenly you don’t. You have a life, and then suddenly you don’t. Changes, swift and certain, have come at Bella over and over in the first eight chapters of this story told from her perspective.
"The truth is, Bella, I simply don't love you as a husband loves a wife,” he explained.
Shocked, I turned my head to look at him; he showed no signs of emotion.
No remorse. No regret. No tears.
No reaction to my state of despair.
The Edward I knew would have comforted me; it would have torn him apart to watch me cry. I was sitting next to a complete stranger and looking into the eyes of a man I did not know.
“I'm taking my car along with whatever I'll need tomorrow. You can keep everything. I'll send you the paperwork once I'm settled,’ he said in a rush, ‘and I'm sleeping in one of the guest bedrooms tonight,” he concluded.
With that, he rose from the couch and walked away from me and, essentially, from our life.
And just like that, Bella is left to pick up the pieces of a shattered future because her husband made this unilateral decision. This is the first change we see through Bella’s eyes, but ultimately the second change we know of. As the story progresses, we learn in a flashback what more than likely precipitated Edward’s harsh decision.
"So Edward, how have you been feeling?"
Edward's smile faded as he swallowed the food in his mouth. "Just fine, sir. I have an MRI scheduled for tomorrow."
Surprised, I asked, "Tomorrow? I didn't know three months had passed already." I looked at Edward, a bit puzzled. We were monitoring the growth of his tumor by having routine MRI's every three months, but I could have sworn he just had one about a month ago.
He didn't answer, staring down at his food instead.
"Okay. Well, what time is it? I'll make sure I'm free," I offered.
"No!" Edward's head shot up. "I mean…that's not necessary. It's just routine. You don't need to take time away from your work for this. I'll be fine and I'll tell you if anything changes. Okay, love?" He placed his hand on my thigh and started rubbing smoothing circles over my jeans.
"Okay," I relented.
When I asked Edward about the MRI results the next night, he told me that everything was fine; I didn't need to worry.
Looking back on it, his mood changed drastically after that night. He became short tempered and curt with me, but I just assumed it was the effects of his numerous meds or the tumor itself.
He left me two weeks later.
Bella has done the best she can to pull herself together since Edward left her almost a year ago. Ultimately, all she wants is peace within her life as she slowly comes to terms with the changes that have happened. She is however, thrust once again into a new change, after answering Alice’s plea for her to come to Texas to be with Edward in his current medical state. When she accepts an invitation to stay in a less than ideal temporary living arrangement, it appears that the solace and stability she is attempting to maintain in her head and her heart are nowhere to be found. Bella continues to be placed in awkward situations through no fault of her own. She feels as if she doesn’t belong there and her moody ex-husband continually drops hints to let her know that her presence is not required or desired. Edward’s parents, his family, his new friends, and even his physical therapist seem to know more about Edward that they aren’t sharing with Bella, which only serves to confuse her more.
And though very cold at times with her while he was hospitalized, Edward manages to deliver a few lines which hint at the kind and loving husband, friend and partner he once was for Bella.
Edward scooted over to the edge of the piano bench and patted the space beside him before returning his attention back to the ebony and ivory keys.
A little shocked at the invitation, I carefully walked back into the room. He said nothing, and neither did I.
I sat down beside him, trying to keep to my side the bench. He continued his song while I sat and daydreamed about happier times. When Edward used to play for me when I'd had a bad day. When he used to play just because he felt inspired.
"I didn't realize how much I missed this," I whispered.
Edward's playing faltered slightly, but he didn't stop. "I don't recognize this; is it new?" I asked.
"I like it."
He said nothing as I stared at him. His hair was growing back quickly after being shaved for the surgery. The scar that traversed the base of his skull and up along his right ear would soon be covered by his autumn-colored locks.
"What inspired this?"
He halted his fingers upon the ivory keys and turned his head toward me, an unreadable expression on his face. He didn't answer me or elaborate. Once again, he returned his attention to his keyboard.
I stood up, wanting to escape the awkward tension and one-word responses to my attempt at conversation. "Sorry…didn't mean to pry."
I turned to walk away when his fingers wrapped around my wrist, pulling me back to him.
The music had stopped, and suddenly there was this energy…a charge in the room.
In this very personal story, Perry Maxwell, provides the readers with some hope that maybe, just maybe, their love story can somehow be pieced back together rather than continue to go on “Unrequited”.
Edward is king of a dying race, his planet torn by civil war. Bella is abducted to become his bride. From college student to Queen... Can she learn to love this strange man and help save his people? AU/OOC. Rated M for lemons, violence and mature themes. Twilight - Rated: M
Review by: MINA RIVERA
I was recommended this fic by a very close facebook friend, Ro Nordmann, and I was hesitant at first. I’m not much into sci-fi and alien romance, but my dear Ro never steered me wrong before.
She didn’t this time either.
And I completely fell in love with Tailward and his people.
This story starts with a sad and terrible ending, but with a new and unconventional beginning.
A depressed and heartbroken Bella prepares herself to end her life, and just when she was about to pull the trigger, she gets taken… BY ALIENS!
Well, actually, she gets taken by a human, Lauren, who lives among aliens, but still… I mean the whole taken scenario: white light, waking up in a white room, not knowing what the hell is happening, yeah, that pretty much sums up alien abduction, right?
But things get an interesting twist for Bella, she wasn’t taken to experiment on her (though the aliens do ‘fix’ her human imperfections), no at all, she gets taken because she’s a perfect match to mate with the Emperor of the galaxy!
‘And here comes the bride’ takes a whole new meaning with this one!
Bella then learns about the Volturi, a dying race that decided to take matters of survival on their own hands, creating the mating search. A team looks for perfect DNA matches for their males, since females have been extinct for a while. That’s how Bella ends up in a different planet, in a different time and is expected to marry the Emperor of the Nine, Edward a.k.a Tailward.
"Why me?" she said. "Out of all the galaxy, why me, Bella Swan? Why doesn't the Emperor marry a woman from his own planet?"
"Because there aren't any women on Volterra," Lauren said. "Centuries ago, the women of his race started dying out. No one could ever find a reason for it. To survive, they started scouring nearby planets for women who were close enough genetic matches to breed with them. As time passed, they began to include more and more planets in their search. Earth has only been on their radar for a few hundred years. At some point, an archaeologist dug up your bones or something and your DNA was entered into a computer. When you came up as a match, I was sent back to get you."
"What if I had already been married?"
Lauren shook her head. "You wouldn't have been entered into the database if you'd been already mated or if you had children. The Volturi have no concept of divorce. Once you're married, you're always married, even if you live separately."
Bella's mind went unwillingly to Mike, but the thought of him no longer pained her as it used to. If he hadn't broken their engagement she'd have never been kidnapped. Yet another way he'd fucked up her life.
"The Emperor... he doesn't look like Tanya, does he?" Bella asked.
Lauren shook her head. "No, she's Dynali, they're not genetically compatible. Here, I'll show you what the Emperor looks like." She tapped on the pad and a man's image blinked into the air.
"He looks human," Bella said, relieved. The image of the man rotating in the air in front of her had rusty red-brown hair and pale skin, paler even than her own.
Lauren nodded, and tapped the pad quickly so that the image vanished. "They're very similar. A few minor differences."
"This is just too strange," Bella whispered. "I can't-" Her head swam again.
"His name is Edward,” Lauren continued, as if Bella wasn't crumbling to pieces in front of her.
"Edward? The alien king's name is Edward?" Bella was an inch away from hysterical laughter, from cracking up and finally ending up in the loony bin that had been a threatening possibility for her entire life. Maybe she was in an asylum and this was all a bizarre fantasy.
"Well, of course his name isn't actually Edward, but your translator implant chooses the nearest English equivalent."
"Wait, did we skip something? What translator chip?"
"He doesn't speak English and you don't speak Volturi. That's a problem when you have multiple planets with multiple cultures in the same Federation. The chip is kind of like one of those chochlear implants that translates sound into electrical impulses that are read by your brain. It hears what the person is saying and instantly translates it to your brain so you can understand them. When you reply, their chips do the same thing for them. They're something that are installed at birth in this galaxy. You can call him Edward and he'll hear his real name in his head."
This story takes one turn after the other, and when you see things only get a bit weirder and dangerous, you can’t help but being completely enraptured by this unique storyline.
I’ll leave you with a little teaser of Bella and Edward’s first meeting.
The room was small with the same stone walls as the hallway and the same hidden light source. The furnishings were scant and it had the air of a waiting room. A small group of men were seated on cushions on the floor. They all stood. Lauren gave Bella a sharp shove and she stumbled through the door. Lauren did not follow. She shut the door behind Bella, leaving without another word.
Bella recognized the one who was supposed to be her new husband, flanked on his left and right by two other men. The Emperor walked slowly toward Bella as if trying to avoid startling her and stopped right in front of her. She had to crane her neck to look up at him. She was 5'4", an average height for a woman, but beside this man she felt tiny. The top of her head barely reached the center of his chest.
He smiled at her and knelt, the other two men copying his movement. "Greetings," he said softly. Up close, she could see the differences between his species and her own. His nose was flatter, a bit wider and his amber eyes had diamond-shaped pupils with no white around the iris visible. When he spoke, she saw flashes of fangs.
She trembled, trying to remember how to speak. "H- hel- hello," she stammered.
He was studying her with great interest, especially her long brown hair. He reached out to touch it and she recoiled at the sight of his hand. He had only four fingers, like the characters of The Simpsons, and each finger was tipped by a wicked-looking claw.
Edward inched a little closer and Bella saw a flash out of the corner of her eye. She stared, shock hitting her like a fist to the stomach. He had a tail and it was sinuously dancing behind his head, the tip of it graced with the same color hair as his head.
The man she had been kidnapped from her planet to mate with had a tail. Having a tail was not a "minor difference."
Now, I have to go, I just got an email alert with a new chapter and I’m dying to know what happens next.
So go ahead, give it a shot, and don’t forget to leave the author a review, tell her TLS sent you!
Until next time,