Awaken by Edward's Eternal-rec'd by Kitkat
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7494523/1/Awaken
A brilliant aloof composer, hiding from the world. An unexpected meeting. How will he react ? Can she help him change his vision on life ? Twilight - Rated: M
Reviewed by: Kitkat Cullen
A brilliant aloof composer, hiding from the world. An unexpected meeting. How will he react? Can she help him change his vision on life?
When you first read the summary for ‘Awaken’ by Edward’s Eternal, you go…
Okay…another fic where Edward is a musician who has cut himself off from everyone. I’ve read a million of those. Like this one is going to be any different…
And then you read the first chapter and realize that Edward’s Eternal has been able to make you eat your words. Edward Masen’s pain, both physically and emotionally, is palpable and every chapter leaves you aching for more answers. When he meets Bella at an awkward question and answer meet and greet, her insightful and intelligent question leaves him desperate for more.
"Emmett, go back in there and find Bella Swan. Bring her in here. Discretely. Please."
There was a moment of stunned silence then I heard a soft "oookkkaayyy" as Emmett left to follow my instructions.
"Edward?" Carlisle's voice expressed his confusion. "What are you doing?"
"Fuck if I know Carlisle, but I liked her question. She actually sensed my train of thought in Twilight? I want to give her a proper answer and ask her a couple questions. Nobody has ever asked about my work or my processes at these stupid things. God I hardly ever get asked that in professional interviews. And she zeros in on that? That score? That memory?"
I drew in a deep breath. "Yeah, I want to talk to her. You have a problem with that?"
"Relax, Edward. You can do whatever you want. I was just…surprised, that's all. Normally you'd already be pacing wanting to get the hell out of here, not asking to actually speak with a fan."
Sighing I replaced the glasses on my face. "Like I said, fuck if I know. But for some reason I want to, so I'm going to."
His friends question his sanity when he pursues her, this girl he just met, but after spending only a few hours together it is clear that there is something between them. She cares for him like no one has in so very long and he seeks out her tenderness. But it isn’t all sweetness and sunshine, because something evil is lurking in the back of Edward’s mind. The memory of another who should have protected and loved him, but didn’t. When he feels himself getting too close, too dependent on her gentle soul, he pushes her away.
"This,was a mistake. A momentary lapse of judgement on my part. This, is done."
With that I turned and walked away, ignoring her gasp of pain. I needed to get out of here now before I either said anything more hurtful or lost complete control. I could feel something building inside that I hadn't felt for a long time and I needed to escape before it reached its peak.
As I stormed towards the connecting door to Carlisle's suite, my foot caught on something and I stumbled forward, landing face down on the hard wooden floor, scraping my palms on the rough surface on the way down.
Instantly I was back to that humiliating time period years ago.
Falling. Stumbling. Pain. Mocking laughter. Cruel words. Taunting barbs. The knowledge I would never be a complete man again. That I was lacking. And reminded of it constantly.
I could still hear her heels clicking on the hard floor as she walked away after witnessing another one of her pranks. "Hope it was a nice trip Edward…."
I was so caught in my memory of the past that I started as I felt hands on me pulling me back into the present.
"Edward, are you alright? "My bag... I'm so sorry, you fell over my bag!" Bella's voice sounded so strange, like she was far away, and muffled.
I pushed her hands away frantically. "Leave me alone, just leave me alone!" I could hear the panic in my voice as I struggled to remain in the present.
I scrambled up to my knees using the couch as leverage and looked to where Bella was sitting on the floor. Her head was in her hands, and her shoulders, her entire body, were shaking and she was making the strangest noise.
Was she laughing at me?
She was laughing at me.
I was a joke.
Even to Bella, I was a fucking joke.
Horrified, I stood and carefully walked the last few feet to Carlisle's door. My glasses were somewhere on the table, but I wasn't going back for them.
Without looking back I opened the door to Carlisle's suite. I stopped briefly before I walked in.
"Get out."
Damn…just reading that again makes my chest hurt.
Bella doesn’t make it easy on him to win her back and he is still unable to tell her everything that is hiding in his past, but they manage to move forward enough to get to the sexin’ and hot damn…the sexin’ is good.
I growled. And leant down and captured her lips with mine again. Her arms wound around my neck and into my hair pulling me as close as possible. Her soft whimper fanned the quiet flames of desire that had been smouldering all day and suddenly turned them into a burning inferno. Grasping her thighs I lifted her up and pressed her into the wall by the door.
I wanted her. Now.
Tongues met, stroked, savoured. Teeth nipped and skin was soothed with swirls of wet heat. Clothing was discarded. Hands adored, fondled and caressed. My body surged forward driving itself into her softness again and again.
Whispered words of passion and love filled the room.
Burying my face in her neck, I begged her to find her release. "Come with me Little One. Please…I need to feel you…"
I felt her muscles clamp down on me and her soft gasps filled my ears like the sweetest of notes. Almost immediately my orgasm raced through me and I groaned her name into her ear over and over again.
For a moment we were silent except for the sound of winded breaths and tiny whimpers. I tenderly kissed her as we reveled in the closeness. Then slowly I backed away, pulling my hands off the wall where they had been braced and releasing Bella from the cage of the hard wall and my body. As her legs unwound from around my waist I steadied her while she found her balance. Pulling her into my arms I reached up and stroked her hair as she nuzzled sweetly into my chest.
Then I frowned. Why was her hair all…tacky? Drawing back I looked down at my hand. There was something all over the palm. Realization washed over me and I gawked over at the wall in horror. With everything else that had happened I hadn't even noticed.
"Bella?"
"Hmm?"
"Did they come fix the wall today?"
Instantly she spun around. And gasped. Then burst out laughing.
"Oh God…Edward…" It was all she could get out between giggles.
"We…you... just… imprinted us…right into the damp paint."
She leaned forward and ran her hand over the wall. "There are your hands…my head…shoulders… oh my God…"she stopped.
"My ass is imprinted into someone's wall," she whispered sounding horrified.
Was that…did they just have sex against a wall covered in wet paint? They did…from the woman who pretty much faded to black in her first story ‘Simply Coffee’. I am so proud *tear*.
I am honored to be a pre-reader for Edward’s Eternal along with Cejsmom and can honestly tell you that it only gets better. The chapters get longer and more descriptive, thanks mostly to Windchymes red pen and the awesome additions of Midnight Cougar (apparently she thinks the word ‘fuck’ could be used like a comma, which is absofuckinglutly true).
There is much that these two have to work through before they get to their happily ever after, but I have no doubt that I will enjoy every second until we get there.
Fatherhood, Formula and Other F Words by Anhanninen-rec'd by Kitty Vuitton
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7520210/1/Fatherhood_Formula_and_Other_F_Words
When man-whore, foul-mouthed Edward's life takes an unexpected turn, he's left with a baby to raise. With the help of a friendly neighbor, he learns sometimes the unexpected could be the best thing that's ever happened. All Human Twilight - Rated: M
Reviewed by: Ag Fanfic
Edward has everything he wants in life. He has a job he loves, that hes talented at and has charisma to charm ladies in to his bed. He’s a surgeon at Olympic Medical Center, where his father is chief of staff. Coming home one night he sees a girl in the parking lot he’s never seen and when he talks to her he thinks shes odd. He goes on about his life and she catches him before he goes in to his apartment and tells him that he had a visitor but she felt like she should invite her in to wait for him. Edward gets a blast from his past and an unexpected change in his life... a baby. Kate, the baby momma, says she tried but she couldn’t do it, that she resented the baby, that she was 22 and couldn’t love her. What does Edward do after Kate walks out the door?? Calls his mom, like every male would do!! He doesn’t know the first thing about babies and he doesn’t want to know.
When Mom came back in with the formula, she sat down next to Dad and set the bottle down, putting one of my dishtowels over her shoulder. Dad passed her the little girl. I watched carefully, maybe a bit too closely, as Sofia drank from the bottle she fed her.
"How uh . . . how did you make that?" I asked.
Mom looked up and smiled. "I can show you. It's very simple. You boil the water, let it cool to room temperature, add it to a bottle, and then add the formula powder. Shake it to mix it all together, and then test the temperature on your wrist."
Why did that seem like she was speaking a different language? I mean, it seemed simple in theory, but actually doing it? I just . . . I'd probably add too much water or some shit and hurt the little girl. Yeah, that'd be great. I'd water down the formula and take away all the nutrients she needed.
Carlisle and Esme run off to Walmart to get what she will need and leave a very unhappy Edward and baby Sofia alone once again. Edward lucks out and gets her to sleep but then she wakes up with a vengeance and screams until the New Girl comes and helps by changing her diaper. His parents come back and set him up with what they got. He gets a paternity test to make sure that she is his and she is. He feels his life is not his own and won’t be for a while.
"What do I do?" I whispered, burying my face in my hands, letting the paper fall to the floor.
After three exhausting days, I had to figure out what the next step was, and I was completely clueless.
"You man up and be a father," he said. "We'll help you as much as we can, but she's your daughter. You have to take care of her. She's your priority now."
I shook my head. "I can't fucking do this."
"You don't have a choice. The son I raised is a good person. He's responsible."
"I'm not responsible! I fuck anything that's hot and comes my way in a bar."
"Not anymore you don't."
"It's who I am. It's what I like doing. I can't fucking go to play dates and read bedtime stories to a kid. That's not me."
"Look at that precious girl by your feet," he said, leaning back in his chair. "She depends on you now. Everything you will do affects her in some way."
"Great. So I'm responsible for ruining her life?"
"You're responsible for giving her a good life."
"And if I can't? Then what?"
He took his reading glasses off and set them in front of him. "I believe you can, son. You're life has changed permanently now."
"What if I don't want it to change?"
"Again, you don't have a choice."
"I'm getting a fucking vasectomy," I sighed.
He laughed. "Oh, Edward, if you think you'll have time for sex, you have another think coming."
I sat up and ran my hand through my hair. "It's not funny."
"It's a little funny."
"Not even close. I like sex. I don't like kids."
"They go hand-in-hand, my boy. You should know this. How much money did I spend putting you through medical school for you to forget that sex leads to babies?"
Poor Edward. Most people have nine months to get ready and adjust to the thought of a baby. Obviously Kate didn’t adjust and now we have daddy Edward trying to get his life in order and take care of his new baby. I don’t want to give away too much but I am loving this story so much already and I can’t wait to see where it goes. How will Bella become apart of Edward and Sofia’s life? Go check this out and leave the author some love, because it is well worth the time!!!
He's Lost Control by Fliegendamsel-rec'd by Jenny Window
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7303322/1/Hes_Lost_Control
"I do have a sister. She's about your age," he went on, studying my face. "If I knew about some older guy, some guy my age, having the kind of thoughts about her, the kind of thoughts I have about you"…his eyes bored into me…"I'd kill him." AH. Twilight - Rated: M
Reviewed by: Jenny Window
Do you remember the first time you yearned to be with someone so strongly that he dominated your waking thoughts and invaded your dreams? What if being with that man was considered by society to be unacceptable? Not illegal, but certain to generate feelings of outrage amongst your family and friends, and condemnation in your community?
“He’s Lost Control” by Fliegendamsel is the story of Bella, a student taking classes through an early acceptance scheme at the University of Washington and Edward, a mathematician conducting research there. Their first meeting is flirtatious and Bella is overwhelmed by the physical attraction she feels for him.
I am also suddenly sharply aware that despite his pretty looks, he is exuding maleness.
As the story progresses it becomes clear there is a significant age difference between Edward and Bella, but this fact does nothing to dampen Bella’s desire for him.
Meanwhile, I've never been so physically aware of someone in my life. I'm drifting through conversations while attempting to pick out his voice across the room. He catches me looking at him once, and he looks away quickly, so I renew my efforts not to look at him again, but it's impossible.
Running through early chapters of the story is a sweet private joke between Edward and Bella about her love for strawberry ice-cream. We don’t know if a physical relationship will develop between them, but Bella’s constant thoughts of Edward result in intensely sexual dreams,
"What flavor were you after?"
"Strawberry."
"Did you get a taste?"
I shake my head slightly, staring into his eyes. I feel intoxicated.
"I want to taste you."
I’m usually more interested in reading about what is actually happening in a story rather than what is happening in the heroine’s subconscious mind, but Bella’s dreams in “He’s Lost Control” are incredibly atmospheric and paint a vivid picture of the passion she feels for Edward. They also make for erotic reading!
"Are you going to drain me too?"
"No," he growls, licking my throat just below my ear as he sits up and leans forward, wrapping both arms around me and supporting me as his thrusts quicken. "I'm going to fill you up…"
The recurring references to Edward being an “emotional vampire” give the story a satisfying link to canon and provide a foreshadowing of the danger Bella may face if she becomes involved with him.
Edward’s desire for Bella is evident, even as he struggles with the knowledge that she is very young.
He tilts his head down and for a moment I think he is going to kiss me back. Instead he whispers,
"So you're sure there's not some mistake?"
"About what?"
"Your age."
I smile. "Yes, I'm fairly sure," I say lightly. His cheek is very close to mine. I want to rub my cheek against his and feel those three days of whiskers again.
"I had been hoping you were, say, nineteen."
"Hoping?" I feel like he is on the verge of addressing it, this thing of ours.
"Thinking. I had been thinking you were maybe nineteen.”
Of course, Edward is aware of the risk a relationship with Bella would pose to his reputation in academia and his friendship with Bella’s brother Emmett, and attempts to keep her at arm’s length.
His fingers brush mine lightly as he takes the cup. He clears his throat and says, jovially,
"Thanks, little sister Bella."
I stop short, stop breathing, and stare at him. I'm sure the sheer overwhelming sense of horror I feel at his words is written all over my face.”
Edward seems unable to subdue his desire for Bella, despite his best intentions, and we are treated to ‘swoon worthy’ moments like these,
He is still holding my wrist, he wraps his hand around it, as if he's measuring the size of it. His long fingers overlap quite a bit.
"Fragile little thing."
Then he lifts it to his mouth and kisses the inside of my wrist.
Fearing disapproval, Bella tries to keep her feelings for Edward hidden, but she finds support in an unexpected place.
"Oh, I'm always on the side of love. Even if it's unwise. That's just the artist in me, I guess."
She adds, "Judging from your previous artwork and your school transcript, you've always been very wise. Judging from your current artwork, I think it's time for you to get unwise."
So....what would you do? Keep the peace with your family, friends and society? Or give in to your desires and give up your control?
"...he's afraid of you. Afraid of how you make him feel. He wants to control your feelings, or behavior, because he's not sure he can control his own."
Fliegendamsel has shared with us a story that has kept me captivated from the first chapter. Her writing is polished and smooth, her storyline completely riveting. Is it realistic to hope that Edward and Bella could have a future together, or does their relationship face too many obstacles? I’m really looking forward to reading more of “He’s Lost Control”, it’s been such an intense and rewarding ride so far.
High School Confidential by Troublefollows1017-rec'd by Lisa
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5948601/1/High_School_Confidential
Bella, fresh from a breakup, starts a new job as a guidance counselor at Masen HS under the watchful eye of her very handsome but very married principal, Edward Cullen. A connection begins to develop as they work together to help the troubled students. Twilight - Rated: M
Reviewed by: Crooked Smile
High School Confidential was the last fic I read in 2010 and that alone is enough for me to say “2010 was a good year.” Generally, I’m not fond of very married Edwards, unless they are married to a Bella. It’s important to mention that, in this story, Edward doesn’t cheat on his wife with Bella. If anyone is hesitating to read it just because Edward is married, note that it has to be like that at first in order to create that kind of UST. And what a blissfully resolving UST it is.
Troublefollows1017’s writing style, for lack of a better word, is masterful. From the start to the end, she manages to keep her readers’ interest alive and lets the story flow smoothly. She remains true to the storyline and doesn’t bore you with unnecessary details or leave anything vague.
One of the most prominent qualities of the story is consistency. The consistency of the plot line. The consistency between and within the characters. The pace of the story is also very well built. Nothing is rushed, premature or unrealistic and nothing is “should’ve happened already!”.
The characterizationl is also very strong. The characters are quite unique and also familiar enough to make you care about them from the start. We get to see the whole gang there. Alice is sometimes speechless, other times scary, but mostly sweet Dean of Students. Jasper is the social studies teacher who is unable to express his feelings to the love of his life. Rosalie is the principle of principal of McCarty High School and Emmett works there as the head football coach. Carlisle and Esme are your usual sweet and perfect parents.
Principal Cullen wins his readers over with the first chapter. He is a caring and charming man, who has good bonds with his family and is still trying to save his failing marriage. He is also damn good at what he does! Plays basketball with students on detention, plays drum, plays with hearts!
The game was exciting and close. By halftime, it was tied 14 to 14. The band took the field during the break and it took me a minute to understand why the student section was going so crazy. In the middle of the drum line was no other than Principal Cullen. He had a set of tenor drums strapped to his chest and he was banging away with the boys in the band.
Bella begins working as a guidance counselor at MHS. She is just out of a relationship. Heartbroken but not a mess. Sweet. Friendly. Devoted. Hard-working. Not afraid of breaking the rules and using unusual ways to reach out her students. And she is goddamn skilled at dealing with ‘I believe in acting out’ adolescences.
"It's a shame you let Mr. Newton have so much control over what you do," I threw out there. Jake stopped walking immediately. "I don't let him control shit. I'm going to ditch because I want to ditch," he said defensively. "Yeah, but you want to ditch because of him. He's the one in control." Jacob's face contorted into an angry grimace. He was trying to figure out a way around my logic and was struggling. "I don't want to be in his class so I hope he fails me. This isn't about what he wants, it's about what I want," Jacob tried to reason. "I guess I think it would be funny if you went to his class and, I don't know, passed it, and stuck it to him since you hate him so much. That would be the ultimate revenge against a teacher like that. But what do I know? What's down this way?" I asked, changing the subject effortlessly.
And he goes to that class very determined to ‘rock that class and make him cry when Newton has to pass him’. Jake is a very complicated character and the most troubled student of the school. Smartass. Badass. And some other asses I won’t bother with listing here. His adoration towards Miss Swan causes some difficulties. No matter how tolerant Mr.C is with him, as Jake would call Edward, he is not that tolerant when it comes to messing with a certain guidance counselor. The change in Jake through the story is very clear and strong. The readers are lucky enough to witness how Miss Swan touches his life and how her touch changes his future.
The gravity between Edward and Bella is undeniable. They try to tame it, but will it work?
I sat her on her couch and slipped her shoes off her feet. With my hand wrapped around her ankle, I had to fight the impulse to run my other hand up her soft, smooth leg. Her skin was this perfect milky white. It was like virgin fucking snow - beautiful to look at but so tempting to make your mark on. I was so tempted but managed to stay strong and put her foot down.
As story proceeds, the readers get to see how Edward and Bella deal with the difficulties that keep them apart and enjoy a very appreciative and down to earth author’s work and read one of the most beautifully written epilogues.
You can run away and you can search for where you belong but the only place that I am ever going to belong is wherever you are.
Silver Strand Nights by JenGreen03-rec'd by Remmy
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5716145/1/Silver_Strand_Nights
Bella Swan is tired of her boring life and ready for a change. When former Navy SEAL Edward Cullen enters her life, everything will change, more than she ever expected. AH - B/E. Rated M.
Twilight - Rated: M
Reviewed by: Cejsmom Twifan
Electronic communication and social media, we all use them these days; texting, Facebook, twitter. We become friends with people we may possibly never meet without their use. The anonymity they provide allows us to be ourselves and let our true personalities shine. Email, this is how Bella, a shy, awkward loner, almost 23, meets Edward Cullen, 33, who is moving to Coronado, CA from Washington, to work under Bella’s brother, Emmett, as a Navy SEAL trainer.
CullenEA2: Hello? This is Edward Cullen. I emailed you the other day.
IMSwan03: Hi, I'm sorry I didn't get back to you before.
CullenEA2: That's fine, I've been busy myself. Anyway, do you think you can help me out? I understand if you've got your hands full.
IMSwan03: I can help. Do you know what you're looking for? House? Condo? Apartment? Do you want base housing?
I definitely didn't want base housing. I had lived that way for far too many years, and I figured I might as well spend my inheritance money on something I would enjoy. This house was going to be permanent, not something short term.
CullenEA2: I'd like something off base, but on the island. House, no apartment or condo. I'd like to keep it under five.
IMSwan03: Million? Five million?
CullenEA2: Yes.
IMSwan03: Okay… well, I know that there is a house down the road from me that is for sale. It's really nice and I have a contact at the real estate company. I could give her your information.
CullenEA2: Great, thanks a lot. I really appreciate it.
While helping Edward relocate, Bella and he quickly form a secret friendship. The first time they see what each other looks like is on their Facebook profiles. Through texting, phone calls, and a brief sighting, they eventually meet in person. Pushing past her fear of her lack of experience with men and his belief that he can never be a father, a mutual admiration develops as well as a strong connection.
She nodded and looked down, her face visibly flushing even in the dimmed darkness.
I wanted to ask her so badly what we were doing and if she felt anything that I felt, but I wasn't feeling man enough to do that. And maybe part of me didn't want to hear her answer. I didn't want her to reject me. I didn't want to hear the excuses that were present.
Like Emmett.
Like our age difference.
Like her shyness that I had to break through constantly.
We drove back to Coronado and Bella helped me find my house; yes, I hadn't even driven by it yet. The owner gave me a key to look it over, understanding my situation that I hadn't even gotten to do a walkthrough of it yet.
"Wow," I commented as we stepped inside the front door.
"It's really nice, huh?" Bella said quietly, running her hand over the kitchen island.
I stood on the other side of the island, leaning over. "Yeah, I really love it. Thanks for helping me find this, Bella."
Her eyes were locked with mine and I felt so fucking drawn to her, more than I had ever been with another woman. I was way too tempted to take the step to show her how I felt, but I knew it would be too soon for her. I still needed to make her feel comfortable around me, and though we were making some progress, she was still very nervous.
We eventually left the kitchen to explore the rest of the house. It had a hot tub in the back, along with a sauna, as well. My bedroom was bigger than the floor plan of my last place. I loved it and was even more ready to get my things moved in and situated. Bella kindly offered to help me move in, which I more than willingly accepted.
I still didn't know how we'd work this out with Emmett. Would he have a problem with us just being friends? Or would he see right through me? Would he see that I kind of had a thing for his little sister?
Neither has had an easy past, which will continue to haunt them and interfere in their relationship, as they get to know each other. Emmett, Bella’s overprotective brother and Edward’s friend and boss, is the son of the man her mother cheated on with Bella’s father. Emmett, his wife Rosalie, and their sons are Bella’s only real family. Emmett shelters and babies Bella, after having rescued her from her father’s home and her abusive Stepmother. Bella struggles, as she learns and yearns to find and fight for her independence. Edward, after returning from active duty, is seeking stability and meaning in his life, all while dealing with the demons of his past and a constantly meddling mother.
Told in alternating POVs, this completed story, by JenGreen03, will lead you through the tumultuous relationship of Edward and Bella as they discover themselves, their love for each other and how sometimes decisions we make, although they may have their repercussions, will not stand in the way of true love.
The Wedding Party by Spanglemaker9-rec'd by Nic
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5861484/1/The_Wedding_Party
The perfect person appears at the worst possible moment, and one unforgettable encounter changes everything. AH Twilight - Rated: M
Reviewed by: vampshavelaws
The Wedding Party by spanglemaker9 is a story I’ve read a few times now. It has the perfect amount of angst vs citrus, and has an interesting plot line that will keep you glued to your laptop screen.
We get a little back history first chapter, along with the feel of Bella’s everyday life. She’s trapped in a relationship that she no longer wants to be a part of; stuck with someone that she no longer feels connected to. She put his career before her own, and ended up giving up more of herself than she ever thought possible. But in a time where he needs Bella more than ever, can she just walk away so easily?
I lay there for a moment, staring at him. His short, tousled blonde hair fell across his forehead, not quite reaching to his prominent brow bone. His eyebrows were nearly permanently furrowed, and it always made him look a little angry. I took in his short, perfectly straight nose, his high cheekbones, the hollows beneath them that had become more pronounced as he got older, his slightly full, pouty lower lip. When I first met him, I thought he looked a little fierce and intense; good-looking in his way. He was still good-looking; I could see that, objectively. But I was startled to realize that I couldn't remember the last time I looked at him and felt a jolt of attraction.
Jay loves me.
Scolding myself didn't help. I still lay there and looked at his face and felt…nothing. I was freaking myself out, so I slid out of bed and padded to the bathroom to clean up. What a lousy fucking girlfriend I was.
I was standing at the sink, washing my hands as I glanced up at my own reflection in the mirror. It was some sort of flash of clarity or something, a brief parting of the clouds that let me see myself, really see myself, for what felt like the first time in ages. What had happened to me? I was only twenty-six, but I looked older and so tired. Like the life had been sucked clean out of me. I was always pale, but my skin looked positively ghostly. My dark eyes were flat and dead. I was a shadow of myself. Where did I go? I knew I wasn't always this person, this half-dead girl I was looking at. What made me like this?
As I stood there in my bathroom at midnight, staring into my own eyes in the mirror, my mind whispered the answer to me.
I don't love him anymore.
It broke over me with a startling, undeniable clarity, leaving me breathless.
I have to leave him.
The thought shook me so thoroughly that I had to sit down with a thud on the edge of the bathtub. My hands were shaking, and a cold sweat broke out across the back of my neck. I clenched my hands into my hair and squeezed my eyes shut, trying to hold it together and not cry.
I didn't love him and I hadn't for a long time. How had this happened? How had I allowed myself to slip into this stifling, dead-end relationship with him? I was dying here; this relationship was slowly killing me. I needed air, I needed out, and I needed it now.
Bella manages to escape for a little while to attend her best friend, Alice’s wedding, Jay deciding to stay at home rather than accompany her due to job worries. Enter Edward.
Scanning the floor frantically, I spotted it several feet away and lunged for it before it wound up stuck to somebody's foot. As I crouched down to get it, I thought I saw someone's face turn towards me in my peripheral vision. I thought maybe it was Alice's dad so when I straightened back up, I took a look. Someone was looking at me, alright. Not Alice's father. Someone amazing.
His face…
I swear I couldn't look away for what felt like several endless seconds. Cheekbones and tousled hair and intense eyes and unbelievable lips. The man made my head spin a little bit just from looking at him. He was beautiful and tall and…oh, my God, he was still looking at me like I was a crazy woman because I was standing there with my mouth open and nearly drooling on myself. He was scowling a little now, his heavy brows pulled together. Ugh…I was an embarrassment. They shouldn't let me out with ordinary people. Poor man, being visually accosted by me while he waited for his bags.
I closed my eyes to clear my head and shoved my way forward into the baggage claim crowd, pretending like I hadn't been just shamelessly ogling a handsome man at the airport. What the hell had just come over me? Whatever it was, it was past now. I'd just keep my eyes down until I got my bag and found Alice's dad, and hopefully I wouldn't see him again.
Needless to say she meets him again. Maid of Honor meets The Best Man.
The attraction is instant from both parties, and Bella allows herself to flirt a little. Allows herself to get caught up in the excitement of what it’s like to be attracted to someone again; what it’s like to feel alive. She eventually gives in and feels.
"Oh, God…" the words tumbled from my lips as I arched away from the wall, willing him to touch me harder. He did, making a low sound in the back of his throat that vibrated all through my body as he kissed his way up my throat to my mouth. This time I met his mouth first, pushing my tongue in hard against his. He slipped his leg forward between my knees until his thigh was pressing against my center. It drove me mad, his soft amazing mouth and tongue assaulting mine, his thigh pressing against me, his hands on my breasts…my body was on fire and I thought he might be able to make me come just like this.
His hand slid down over my hip, pulling on my thigh, raising my leg, hooking it over his hip. Jesus, yes…With the shift in position, I could feel how hard he was, and it was pressed directly against me, right where I was desperate for it. He reached underneath me, cupping my bottom, raising me up, helping me ride against him.
Without warning, he hiked my other leg up. I gasped at my loss of balance, gripping his shoulders with both hands. But within seconds I felt secure, held up by his hands and the wall at my back. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders as he settled in against me. I could feel the whole hard length of him pressed against my panties as my ruined dress rode up to my hips. He rocked his hips into mine and I groaned through my teeth against his lips. I felt one of my shoes slip off my foot, and I kicked the other one away before hooking my calves more securely around him.
I didn't want to think about my real life right now, and for the most part, I didn't. But I couldn't help but realize that no sexual experience I'd had in my life before compared to what was happening with Edward right now, and we still had most of our clothes on. It hadn't been like this with the few men I'd dated in college, and certainly never with…Don't even think his name. Not here, not now, with Edward touching me, pinning me to the wall, and making me feel…
Feelings only intensify after this, and Bella realises that she needs to end things with Jay. But upon returning home things have drastically changed, and Jay’s worries and paranoia have taken a turn for the worse. And a simple misunderstanding turns into something that can’t be ignored: Jay has a mental illness.
"Let me go. Let's just sit down and talk."
"You fucking betrayed me with him!"
"Jay…"
"I said don't lie!" His face was in my face; I was leaning back as far as I could while he had my arms in that vise grip. He was still shaking all over and shaking me. Then, without warning, he just let go; he threw his hands up in the air and turned away from me. I lost my balance, all the force of his grip transferred into my backwards momentum. I almost caught myself, but then I tripped on the edge of the rug and I was falling.
It all happened in a split second but it seemed to take a lifetime. So many thoughts flew through my head in the millisecond that I cut through the air. I knew I'd hit those stupid glass shelves on the wall behind me. I always did. And I knew if I was lucky, I'd just bruise the crap out of myself, like I always did. I wasn't lucky.
I slammed into the shelves with a staggering force, making them all rattle audibly. It knocked the air out of my lungs and I sagged. Then there was a sickening crack and a flash of blinding pain across the top of my head. It hit me so hard that my head felt jolted down onto my neck and my teeth slammed together. My wooden sculptures on the top shelf, the ones Charlie gave me. They weighed a ton.
And then one second I was leaning against the shelves and the next, the shelves were giving way underneath me with a crack and the tinkling sound of glass hitting the floor. Later on, I figured out that one of the sculptures hit and shattered the glass on the way down. I was still stunned from the blow to my head. My ears were ringing and my vision was starting to tunnel. I didn't even realize I'd lost my balance and fallen forward until I was sliding down the wall. And the wall was wet. Dark and wet where I'd reached out to catch myself.
Are Bella and Edward able to overcome all these obstacles thrown at them, both from themselves and other parties, and finally find happiness? I’ll let you find that out for yourself.
Give The Wedding Party a try, and I’m sure you’ll become hooked just as I did when reading.
The White Swan Lodge by Jarkin33-rec'd by Nat
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6389047/1/The_White_Swan_Lodge
Tragedy led her there. Commitment forced him there. Can a place of beauty and solitude hold the fate they were both seeking. Twilight - Rated: M
Reviewed by: Evilnat
Jaime Arkin is one of my favourite fan fiction authors. Her stories are beautifully written and the storylines are always so captivating. So, I was surprised that I had not read The White Swan Lodge until a couple of weeks ago, and boy was I crazy for not snatching it up while it was still a work in progress. She had me right from the prologue:
I held her hands beneath mine, my body flush against hers, and I knew she could feel how hard I was getting. She pushed back gently against me. We remained silent, letting our bodies do the communicating. I groaned in her ear and softly sucked on her lobe... I then whispered, "You're so beautiful... I want you, baby." She turned into my embrace and pressed her soft breasts against my chest. She met my gaze and searched my eyes. For a brief moment, I worried I had pushed her too far. Then she seductively said, "I'm sorry too and fuck... I want you... so much."
She forced me to step backwards until my back hit the opposite railing. Her hands found my hair and pulled my head close. She ran the tip of her tongue along my lower lip, slowly sucking it into her mouth, then nipping it before letting go. I grasped the sides of her face. The last of the setting sun cast a glow on her tear stained cheeks. Brushing over them with my thumbs, I gazed into her eyes and covered her mouth with mine. There was nothing slow about that kiss. It was deep and it was passionate. My fingers delved into her silky hair as our tongues tangled, swirled and tasted. Her sexy moans drove me on.
The White Swan Lodge is set at a Lodge (yes it really is!), in Washington state. Bella moves from Phoenix to take over operation after her mother dies. She is strongly determined to keep it as successful as her mother and although she faces a few obstacles on the way, she also learns from them.
The first few days at the lodge were very emotional. I spent a great deal of time sorting through my mother's personal belongings. It was a heart wrenching task, but one I knew I had to face. In doing so, I experienced bittersweet moments of remembrance as well as painful feelings of regret. I was assaulted with the reality that we had missed so much in our lives as mother and daughter. I would never have the opportunity to make up for so many lost years. That fact only strengthened my determination to move forward with preparing the lodge for life again, in honor of my mother.
Edward is a travel writer for ‘Adventure’ magazine who has spent the past three years travelling for work. He’s kind of alone and used to the life he’s been leading but he’s also a little lonely and missing his family, who all live in Seattle while he resides in Chicago.
Edward is sent on assignment to review The White Swan Lodge even though his boss is aware that its owner died only two months previous and it is now under new management.
After asking about a room for the week, she became seriously flustered. I suddenly felt an overwhelming sympathy for this woman. She'd obviously been busy working on the lodge presentation, not to mention suffering a tragic loss. So, I did something I'd never done in the past; I offered to stay someplace else. I was going to be in the area for four weeks and I could simply go back at a later date. She responded abruptly and insisted I stay there. Guilt tore through me as I thanked her and carried on with my typical bullshit excuse about needing a quiet place to write.
Bella and Edward develop a fast attraction to each other and quickly become intimate. The only problem is that he doesn’t tell Bella he is there to write a review. He is also due to depart at the end of the week, leaving the future of their relationship up in the air. A little bit of angst ensues but it is resolved relatively quickly.
Playfully pushing her onto the bed, I placed one knee between her legs as she scooted herself back so that she was now lying naked and gorgeous in front of me with her legs slightly parted and a look of pure desire on her face.
"Edward if you don't touch me I'm going to combust." She moaned.
Leaning forward I placed open mouthed kisses around her belly button and worked my way up to the valley between her breasts. My hand attended to one breast, while my lips wrapped themselves around the other. Her hiss of pleasure was enough to convince me that she enjoyed what I was doing. Pulling on one nipple and rolling it between my fingers, my teeth nipped and my tongue licked the other. I pushed my thigh that was between her legs tighter to her body and the heat emanating from her core was almost my undoing. I could feel her wetness on my leg and if her hands weren't tightly grasping my hair, I would have dove immediately into that heat.
"You're breasts are so beautiful Bella…God you're beautiful." I kissed my way down her torso and dipped my tongue into her belly button and I could see goose bumps rise on her skin as she moaned again.
As I eased my body down hers, her legs spread wider to accommodate first my hips then my waist and then my chest. I kissed her right above her sex and slowly ran my fingers down. I looked up at Bella; I wanted to see the vision in front of me before I took my first taste of her. Bella's head was thrown back, her long hair tangled, framing her face. Her flushed body laying across the bed…her hands were twisted into the comforter and her mouth was slightly parted. She was nearly panting.
"Bella…" I whispered
The supporting cast consists of some of the usual suspects; Charlie, Jake and some of Edward’s family, especially Alice are mentioned quite regularly but tend to take a back seat to Bella and Edward’s relationship. Rosalie and Emmett appear as guests to the Lodge but are gone as quickly as they arrive.
As always there is no disappointment in reading something written by such a prolific author. Jaime writes characters you can relate to; they are normal people with an extraordinary connection. She uses beautiful imagery and her stories have just the right amount of angst mixed in with an amazing romance and great lemons.
Jaime has a great blog which features all of her fantastic banners and info on all her stories and collaborations. Check it out at http://jaimearkin.blogspot.com/
If you haven’t read The White Swan Lodge yet, do so, you won’t be sorry.
Nat xx
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