TLS Special SNEAK PEEK Feature

 

The Lemonade Stand has spent so many years bringing you the best the Twilight fandom has to offer, and we are very excited to have the chance to offer you even MORE. We've watched stories grow and develop from first post through COMPLETE, and now we're lucky enough to share previews of the stories that will soon be your new addiction.

This week our feature is the talented iambeagle, author of fandom favs The Procedure, Don't Delete the Kisses, and Kiss Me, You Idiot. She's sharing an excerpt of her upcoming fic Shiver.

banner by LizziePaige

Shiver 
by
Iambeagle

Summary:  He doesn’t think about me. He doesn’t think about our future or how his decisions will affect us. I’m second best. I always will be.

X ~ X ~ X

“Maybe we shouldn’t talk about this,” Edward mumbles, and disappears into the bedroom.

I immediately get up from the couch and follow after him. 

“What, you want to end this argument now?" I ask incredulously. "You get to leave town in a couple of days and be distracted, and I have to just sit here and stew in our unresolved fight? Fuck that. Don’t do that to me.”

He removes his black T-shirt and tosses it on the floor. I stay silent, waiting for a response, staring at his tattooed arms and chest until he turns away from me.

“I’m not gonna be able to tell you what you want to hear. So, it’s fucking pointless,” he mutters, grabbing a clean white tee from the dresser.

“I’m sorry I want something more for you. I love that you’re a musician, and that you’re so passionate about what you do, but—”

“You want more for me?” he sneers, pulling the shirt over his head and scrubbing a frustrated hand through his hair. “Don’t twist your apology like that. Like you’re the good guy, and I’m the bad guy for doing something I love.”

“That’s not what I’m trying to do,” I insist, throat constricting with the urge to cry. “I just... I guess I wish you loved me as much as you do the band.”

“It’s different, and you fucking know it.”

He walks back into the living room, and I follow again, refusing to let this end. 

“Trust me. I do know it’s different. You always put the band first,” I tell him as I sit back down on the couch. He grabs his cigarettes and lighter from the coffee table, like he’s desperate for a smoke. “All of your money, focus, energy, everything goes into the band. You didn’t even tell me tonight that you quit your job until hours later. How do you think that makes me feel?”

“I already said sorry,” he reminds me, shrugging. “I didn't think about it.”

And that’s what this boils down to. He doesn’t think about me. He doesn’t think about our future or how his decisions will affect us. I’m second best. I always will be.

I’m crying then. I fucking hate being the emotional one, the one who ends up in tears during fights, but I can’t help it. It’s exhausting, having the same fight over and over again. It’s exhausting loving a man who doesn’t quite love me back in the same way.

X ~ X ~ X

Remember to put iambeagle on alert so you don't miss out! Shiver will begin posting soon.